Amaryllis
by Anae-chan
Summary: Both Shusei and Hotsuma struggled with their fates, with themselves ever since they were kids. This is how it happened - how two children grew up to be Zweilts, partners, and eventually, grew to understand and love each other.
1. Chapter 1 - Better version

_Title__: Amaryllis  
__Author__: Anae  
__Beta__: None. Anyone willing out there?  
__Fandom__: Uragiri wa boku no namae wo shitteiru - Betrayal knows my name  
__Characters/pairing__: Shusei/Hotsuma  
__Rating__: overall M/NC-17  
__Spoilers__: overall thorough the manga  
__Disclaimer__: After finishing and re-working with this, I would deserve the boys, but no. Not mine. The song used belongs to Shinedown.  
__Summary__: Both Shusei and Hotsuma struggled with their fates, with themselves ever since they were kids. This is how it happened - how two children grew up to be Zweilts, partners, and eventually, grew to understand and love each other._

_A/N__: I'm going through manga 'til the end of Shusei's and Hotsuma's arch - with my personal touch, with scenes that were in the manga and a lot that are product of my imagination. I'm going to put up a new chapter each week, since this was my NaNoWriMo (hence I only need to go trough it again and make it better). Hope you enjoy._

_Ps.__ Reviews are love, and needed, since this has been and will be a long, long process. _

_Pss. Do you know the symbolic meaning of Amaryllis? "Success won after a struggle."_

* * *

_Chapter 1 – Better version_

* * *

_I am not perfect and I don't claim to be_

_And if that's what you wanted_

_Well then I'm so sorry_

_How about a better version of the way that I am?_

* * *

A young child was standing outside the living room door – just mere moments ago, he had thought about going in to tell his parents how he was finished with homework, hoping that maybe they could check if the answers were correct. In other words, hoping to spend some time with his family.

Upon hearing his parents' conversation – more of an argument – he halted his steps, comfortable by just looking at them from the distance – a doorway in this case.

"You were the one who said you wanted a kid in the first place!" his mother angrily snapped, eyes burning as she looked at her husband. "That's why I gave birth to _it_."

If Shusei had ever thought his parents loved him – or even had an interest in him – those fragile hopes were crushed right there. The pure loathing on his mother's voice was impossible to miss. She was uncaring enough to think of her child as nothing more than an object – she barely thought of him as a human being.

In a way, she wasn't all that far from the truth.

Sad, golden eyes watched from the doorway as the man stood up to the woman. "Don't call him that! You're his mother, you know."

Silently, the boy turned his back to the two arguing adults as her mother claimed how his father was no better than her. That was the truth, since the man had long ago stopped caring about anything else but his work and lover. Even if the two of them had a child – one they had wanted once upon time, back in time when they were young and in love – they didn't have any love to give to their son.

Somewhere deep inside Shusei realized that it wasn't his fault – he had grown up the way his parents had brought him up. For the longest time, it had meant trying to get their attention by being a good, obedient child who caused no worries to his parents. It had meant studying; doing everything in order to be a perfect child his parents seemed to want.

But apparently, in the end, it didn't matter. His parents didn't want him to exist in the first place – it was something no child could change, no matter how hard they wished or tried.

Shusei was on his way to upstairs, to his room, to do something, anything that would bring his thoughts away from his own unwanted existence, but was stopped by a rather silent noise.

There was a quiet knock on the door.

Without a second thought, Shusei walked to the front door and pulled it open. Outside stood a child – one year younger than Shusei himself – looking thoroughly battered. The pouring rain had wetted him completely – blond hair hang onto his face, his jacket was glued onto his skin. But even with bangs hiding his eyes and water dripping down on his face, it was clear that the child was crying.

"Hotsuma –" Shusei called out, eyes wide and open, shocked. It wasn't uncommon for Hotsuma to appear on his doorstep, but the other boy was happy by nature – Shusei couldn't think of anything that would shock him so much. "What happened…" he started, about to reach out to his friend, but Hotsuma beat him to it by lowering his head to Shusei's shoulder. It landed with a low 'thud' as slender arms cradled him into an embrace.

For a while, Hotsuma only called out his friend's name as Shusei held him. Tears poured down, moistening Shusei's shoulder. "I exist, don't I?"

That was a question a child under the age of ten shouldn't be asking – despite his own age, Shusei understood that. The tears and the pained look on Hotsuma's face were bothering Shusei to an extent he couldn't explain – it was like he was the one hurting.

Instead of forcing Hotsuma to look him in the eye and asking what was wrong, Shusei pulled his friend close. He was beyond caring about getting wet – it was inevitable, Hotsuma had been in the pouring rain for hours, at least. "What's wrong?" he whispered, somehow having a feeling that this was a point of no return. "Did something happen?"

Hotsuma hic-cupped, squeezing his eyes shut. "It just…" He didn't know how to explain. More than that, he was terrified that Shusei would run away from him, just like his little brother had. "…suddenly spread out of nowhere." He hadn't meant any harm, it had just happened. "I…"Hotsuma had to swallow in order to continue – tears were making him unable to see, blinding his vision, a lump had just appeared in his throat, making it hard to speak, hard to even breath. "I… set someone on fire…"

It probably would've been natural to claim it as a lie, to tell that something like that was impossible – even a child knew that. Shusei did none of that. His slim fingers just gripped Hotsuma harder, feeling his pain on his own heart, feeling like it was him who was suffering.

They stayed there for a long time, as long as it took for Hotsuma's ragged breathing to slow down, for his tears to stop blinding him. When there were just a few hiccups every now and then, Shusei dared to let go, to slip his hands into Hotsuma's sweating palms. The kneeled down a bit, trying to catch his friend's eyes.

"Hotsuma?"

Tear-filled golden eyes finally reached other pair of the same colour, sharing the same anxiety. Without any further question or explanations, Shusei let go of other of the hands he was holding, starting to back towards the open door, towards the warm house, eyes never leaving Hotsuma's.

Shusei's grip on Hotsuma's hand was firm, but he could've pulled himself away if he had wanted to. Hotsuma let himself be guided inside, up the wooden stairs, all the way to Shusei's room. Neither of the two children paid attention to older boy's parents, who had stopped arguing and settled down to watch soap opera from TV and working instead – neither of them paid any attention to the children either. No-one of the family realized that at that time, they fell into a common understanding – the parents didn't care what Shusei did as long as the boy didn't give them trouble, and in comparison, Shusei didn't need to ask them for permission or anything in general.

When the two children reached the door, Shusei pushed it open, pulling Hotsuma in after him, closing the door after that. There was no need to lock it – he had keys, but it was clear that there was no one in this house who was interested in his doings. He only let go of Hotsuma's hand to push the wet jacket down from other boy's shoulders.

The wet jacket landed on the floor with a low thud, but neither of the two boys paid any attention to it. Hotsuma let go of his friend's hand, numbly walking to the bed. The shoes he kicked off as he went, and then flopped himself on the bed, sitting on it, pulling his knees to his chest, hands coming to circle them.

Shusei was still standing on the door, pained eyes following his friend as he moved. "Hotsuma, we have to get your wet clothes changed. Otherwise you catch a cold."

"I don't care."

"But…"

"I don't care, Shusei!" Hotsuma snapped, raising his head, fiery eyes glaring Shusei.

His anger quieted down at the exact moment he looked at Shusei. The other boy was staring at him, his golden eyes big and pained – as if he was the one hurting instead. Hotsuma couldn't understand that – he had just told Shusei that he had set someone on fire. Shouldn't Shusei act like the rest and leave him?

Shusei closed the distance between them, flopping himself to the bed as it let out a low creak, his hands coming to rest upon Hotsuma's. "Please. I don't want you to get sick."

Hotsuma fiercely shook his head, closing his eyes – it was a mistake, he could see the kid going up in flames again. Yellow, red, white – the colours danced behind his eyes as he saw how the bully was engulfed by those flames, burning to ashes.

Tears came back, and he flung himself on Shusei, making them both fall down onto bed. Hotsuma's fingers gripped on Shusei's shirt as he buried his head on his chest. "Shusei", he choked out, not understanding what he wanted, what he wished for – he didn't even understand what had happened.

Shusei didn't either, but what he understood was that Hotsuma was here, hurting, in pain, and that he needed him. So he circled his arms around the other boy as the tears fell down on his damp clothes, on his pale skin. He said nothing, just held Hotsuma, biting back tears of his own. Hotsuma's pain was fresh, raw and it felt like someone was clawing his heart as well. How that was possible, Shusei didn't understand, but neither did he care at the moment.

All that Shusei cared about was a crying boy on his arms – the fact that his parents almost hated him, it didn't matter at all. Truth to be told, Shusei didn't want to care about them either – if he did, he would just end up getting hurt all over again.

A couple of runaway tears run down on his cheeks as he tightened his hold of the crying boy on his arms – Shusei's family and Hotsuma's brother may just had turned their backs on them, but for the very least, they had each other.

It was a comfort beyond imagination.


	2. Chapter 2 - I'll follow you

_Beta: I'd seriously need beta. So, one wanted.  
__A/N__: __ I don't think I've ever done this heavy editing (and banging my head to the desk to make chapter at least okay by my own standards). Still, hope you enjoy.  
Ps. I still love and need comments._

* * *

_Chapter 2 – I'll follow you_

* * *

_I'll follow you down while we're passing through space_

_I don't care if we fall from grace_

_I'll follow you down_

* * *

On the following day after the incident, the two boys stayed inside the four walls – it was weekend, after all, so they didn't need to worry about school. The day passed by as they sat together. It wasn't before the evening that Shusei left the room, only to go downstairs to grab something to eat for both of them. His parents only asked how long the other boy was going to stay – something of which Shusei didn't have an answer for.

Surely, despite Hotsuma's unwillingness to go home and see eye to eye to what had happened, going back would be unavoidable at some point. Children like them couldn't live on their own, after all. If they could, it would've been great – not needing to care about anyone or anything else. But in the world they lived in, in society such as this – it was impossible.

They ate in silence, but after that Hotsuma finally spoke. "You're not gonna ask anything?"

Shusei shook his head. He didn't want to force Hotsuma to do anything he wasn't comfortable with, especially not after last night. "You tell me when you want to."

Hotsuma pulled his legs to his chest again, golden eyes locked into Shusei's, studying the other boy, deep in his thoughts. "I think I want to."

After Shusei's nod, Hotsuma started speaking. He told Shusei how the older kids had bullied his little brother and how he had stepped between them, wanting them to stop doing something so unfair. How he hated them for acting like they had the right to kick and hit someone who was weaker and younger than them. How he had angrily, swallowed by his hate, shouted 'disappear'. After that, the scorching flames had come out of nowhere, swallowing the bully. How the bully had screamed in pain, how he had tried to roll on the ground to distinguish the flames – how all those efforts had been for nothing. The red-white fire simply kept burning and burning, even after the screams subsided and the boy fell to ground. When there was nothing but ashes left, the flames simply disappeared.

It was like boy had burned due to Hotsuma's words, like it was somehow his fault, like he had commanded the flames to kill the other boy – he had been angry, and wanted the kid to die at the moment, but it wasn't like he killed him, right?

The boys' parents had told them that they were Zweilts – people who were supposed to fight something like demons when they'd be old enough, but that was all they had been told.

But even if they were something called Zweilts, there was no way anyone could make the flames appear out of nowhere, right? It was something that only happened in stories and fairytales, wasn't it?

Of course, the shock of seeing other child burst into flames before Hotsuma – because of him – had wounded the younger boy deeply, scarring him. But the other kids' reaction was something that pained him the most – they had been so scared of him, screaming and running away from him. Even his little brother, who had always looked up to his big brother had looked at him with fear of his eyes, screaming at him not to come closer, calling him a monster.

When Hotsuma finished explaining what had really taken place last night, the tears were back, burning behind his eyelids. On Monday, the whole school would know what he did, everyone would hate him, would push him away, would call him monster.

Shusei moved a bit closer to his friend, and after their eyes met, he told him: "I'll stay with you."

Those were raw, honest words, and while looking into the depths of his friend's eyes, Hotsuma realized that he believed in them. He wanted to believe in Shusei. "Promise?" he weakly asked, swallowing the lump on his throat.

The brown-haired boy offered him a small smile. "Promise."

* * *

On the next day, Hotsuma's parents called, asking if their son was staying over at Shusei's house. They asked Hotsuma to come home.

Hotsuma, being terrified on what might be his parents' reaction, didn't want to go. No matter what Shusei tried to tell him, it all seemed to be of no avail – Hotsuma simply didn't want to go come, didn't want to face his little brother, didn't want to face his parents. When he stayed with Shusei, it was easy to pretend nothing had happened.

In Hotsuma's mind, it was clear that his parents wouldn't take him back, no way they would, knowing what he did. He would be forced to leave home and end up somewhere far far away, away from everything he knew. He didn't want that, and neither did Shusei.

"Let's run away", he pleaded, taking Shusei's hand.

"Where?"

"Doesn't matter. Somewhere."

Shusei pondered the question for a while. If they were lucky, they might just make it – Japan was a big country after all, and it was highly likely that nobody would look for two runaways for a long time.

Plus, if this Zweilt-thing – as important as it might be – would only result of them getting hurt, wouldn't it be better to leave it behind too?

"Okay", he finally answered, smile tugging his lips as he saw how Hotsuma's face lighted up. "But we need clothes and food and –"

"Shusei!" came a shout from downstairs. "There's someone to see you and Hotsuma."

The two boys looked at each other, panic taking place. It was probably Hotsuma's parents, or someone from school – someone who would destroy their plan of leaving everything behind.

If they were to run away, they would need to do it now. Shusei made his way to window and pushed it open and looking down. Sure, they were on second floor, but it still wasn't that high drop – there were bushes underneath. Without thinking more of that, Shusei climbed on the panel, his eyes on Hotsuma. "Come on!" he said, extending his hand.

Hotsuma didn't need to think twice – he took Shusei's hand, and one after another they jumped down from the window. It hurt a bit, but bushes took the worst of the fall, resulting only to a few scratches for the two boys.

Then they just took each other's hands and started running. They didn't care where, as long as they would get away. If the adults were to catch them, they would surely take Hotsuma away to somewhere – and they would never see each other again. If that was the alternative, it was better just to run away.

The rain started falling down at some point when they made their way to the familiar alleys. At some point, they had to stop running because it hurt – they made their under a bridge nearby, just to have a break and a shelter from the rain.

For a while, boys just sat there, catching their breaths. As their eyes met, they couldn't help but smile. Three days ago, Shusei would've never thought that he would run away – but apparently, things could change very fast.

Vaguely, Shusei wondered if his parents were looking for him. Most likely not – they didn't care. As he eyed Hotsuma, he couldn't help but think that if Hotsuma were to go away, what would be left for him? Shusei was fairly popular at school, but he didn't have any real friends – none but Hotsuma. Hotsuma, on the other hand, had always been really popular at school, and he had had many friends, but in the end, he always came to Shusei.

Why was that? Shusei didn't know. In his eyes, Hotsuma was amazing, and he could've had any friend he wanted.

"Let's go." Hotsuma's voice pulled Shusei back to the present. The other boy had stood up and was offering his hand to Shusei. "We have to run further so no one will find us, right?"

Shusei nodded as he took the hand that pulled him up.

Then they were on their way again, running as the cold rain fell down from the sky, making their clothes stick to their skin, making them soaking wet.

At some point, Shusei pulled Hotsuma further to the side, leading him to the narrow alley of the outskirts of the town. When the younger boy was about to ask why, Shusei just shook his head and pressed a finger on his lips.

As a car pulled to the side, it was all the confirmation Shusei needed. He had had a feeling that someone had been following them for a while now – the feeling was something he couldn't quite explain, it was more a sixth sense or a gut feeling. Nevertheless, their follower was an adult, and that wasn't good news for them.

Hotsuma realized the same not long after the car stopped and they saw a man stepping out. The pair didn't stay to see more, but instead ran deeper to the maze of alleys.

That was until they met a dead end.

Despite his age, Hotsuma cursed, and when they turned around, there was a man in beige trench coat standing before them. "What do you want?" Hotsuma demanded, angrily glaring at the unknown man, hand frantically gripping Shusei's.

The man smiled, kneeling down before the two kids to reach their level of height. "Hotsuma Renjou and Shusei Usui, right?"

That caught Hotsuma by surprise. "Yeah." He was quick to catch the rebellious line of thought, though. "What do you want?"

As Hotsuma and the man talked, Shusei found himself studying the unknown person that had just appeared before them. The man had long, light brown hair that fell down all the way to his hips and a scar on his left cheek. The man was slim by build and he couldn't have been more than 30 years old – yet he gave off the feeling that he had been living for a long, long time.

"To talk to you", he answered, a small smile playing on his lips. "I can explain what happened to you yesterday, Hotsuma. I can explain why the bully burst in flames."

The shock was written all over Hotsuma's face, and Shusei was surprised too. Why did this man know about it? He didn't seem to be a police or anything and he wasn't one of the kids' parents, so why did he know?

Moreover, why did it feel like they had met before even if Shusei was sure he had never seen the man in his life?

"What's your name, mister?" Shusei found himself asking, eyes on the older man.

The man's lips curled upwards in a way that crept Shusei out a bit. "Giou Takashiro."

Shusei was sure he had heard that name before, but he couldn't remember where or when. He bit back a wince – thinking about it made his head hurt.

Takashiro stood up, looking down into two kids' eyes. "Come with me", he told them, leaving no place for protests as he turned around, gesturing the children do as they were told. When he noticed the boys didn't make any effort to move but instead just stood in the rain, eyes locked with each other, silently asking what the other wanted to do, hands frantically gripping each other's, fingers entwined, Takashiro sighed and spoke up again. "Your parents know that you're with me." He paused for a while, looking over his shoulder to the entwined fingers. "Neither them nor I have any wishes to separate you two. So come."

Shusei and Hotsuma looked at each other and ever so slowly, quietly, Shusei took a step forward. He didn't know who this Takashiro was, but he had a feeling they had met before, even if he couldn't remember it. And at that time, it had been okay to trust the man.

Hotsuma still didn't move, even if Shusei tugged his hand. When the brunette boy turned, Hotsuma just looked him with an unsure expression, golden eyes troubled.

"It's okay", Shusei ensured him. Someway, somehow, it was.

Quietly, Hotsuma nodded, his lips setting into a firm line, and together, they moved forward, silently walking after this man named Takashiro Giou.


	3. Chapter 3 - Future

_Beta: Still needed.  
A/N: I hate my internet. Due to problems with that, I couldn't post this before. Also, this chapter has a lot of explaining stuff. Sorry for that. Anyway, here you go.  
Ps. Does anyone know any other places to read/post good fiction nowadays?_

* * *

_Chapter 3 - Future_

* * *

_Despite the writing on the wall_

_My future's bleak and rather small_

* * *

The boys followed Takashiro through the narrow alleys, all the way to the backseats of the car – Takashiro took the front seat, simply waving his hand to the driver as an indication to start going.

"We're going to my mansion", Takashiro briefly explained to the kids, eyeing them over his shoulder. "I'll explain everything there." He paused for a second. "If you're worried about your parents, please don't. They know you're safe and with me for the time being."

Hotsuma opened his mouth to say something, but Shusei gripped his hand and shook his head, indicating that it was better to stay silent for once. The younger one made a face, but didn't say anything.

Neither of the two noticed Takashiro following them from the re-view mirror of the car – they also missed the smile that was tugging the man's lips upwards.

* * *

It took them about half an hour the reach the estate, and upon seeing the huge building, Hotsuma couldn't help himself. "It's huge!" Amazement was written all over his face, and smile was making its way as well. "So cool!"

Takashiro chuckled upon the child's reaction and as they stepped inside, he spoke again. "This is Fuyutoki." He made a gesture towards the driver – he was a handsome man, his hair black and camped back. The boys thought he might around Takashiro's age, maybe a bit younger. Fuyutoki wore a white blouse with black jacket – upon seeing the man, one couldn't help but think that he looked like a traditional butler.

Fuyutoki bowed a bit, gently smiling to the boys. "Please, come with me."

Hotsuma made a face, fiercely glaring at Takashiro. "You promised to explain!"

Takashiro just smiled upon the kid's words, but to Shusei, it seemed that there was a small, cold edge that hadn't been there before.

"You don't want Shusei to get sick, do you? You both have to change to dry clothes. After that, it's time for explanations."

Neither of the two children realized it at the time, but Takashiro always chose his words with care. He knew that Hotsuma couldn't care less if he got sick – it would've just meant that he wouldn't need to go to school, but he did care about his best friend. Shusei had always been more fragile of the two, getting sick easier than Hotsuma.

It had always been like that, and even if Takashiro had known these kids less than an hour, he was certain that that was the case. There were some things that never changed, not even upon of a start of a new life.

As Takashiro had predicted, Hotsuma stared at him for a while before turning his eyes to Shusei, who had was slightly shivering due to cold. "I'm fine", Shusei offered, but Hotsuma simply went and took his hand, pulling the brunette with him, walking towards Fuyutoki.

The adults exchanged amused gazes, and then the butler and kids were on their way.

* * *

It didn't take too long for the children to dry themselves up and exchange the rain-soaked clothing to dry ones – apparently Takashiro and Fuyutoki had visited their homes while looking for the kids, and upon realizing that the two had ran away, they had picked some spare clothes.

When that was done, Fuyutoki directed them to a room with small sofas – when looking upon it, one could easily tell that it was made for having private conversation. The atmosphere was different from an office where these kinds of discussions usually held place – the air of the room was a bit more relaxed. That was the very reason Takashiro had chosen to tell the kids about their fate here – it was something that wasn't easy to take in, anyway.

Takashiro took his time explaining – Shusei and Hotsuma knew very little of themselves at the moment. After multiple experiences, Takashiro had learned that it was for the best for Zweilts to grow up in as normal environment as possible – and let them know grow up only knowing a little. Of course when the time would come, further explanations would be needed – for Hotsuma, and Shusei, in this lifetime, the time had come now, and it was still early.

Nevertheless, Takashiro explained everything from the beginning. He told the two that they were Zweilts, people who were meant to fight against the Duras, in order to keep their mortal enemy, Reiga, at bay and keep the world from being swallowed by the darkness.

But Reiga hadn't awoken yet – it meant that they still had time, and they should use that time wisely – to learn how to use their abilities to the fullest, first by themselves and then together, as a pair.

Yes, the Zweilts were reborn after a certain period of time – upon a pact Takashiro himself made a long time ago, he was able to control that cycle of rebirth. Neither Shusei nor Hotsuma probably remembered anything of their previous lives, not yet at least, but it was highly likely that some memories would return. Not every single one, because forgetting was one of the traits of human mind – but something would be bound to return.

Hotsuma and Shusei were Zweilt pair – Zweilts always fought as a pair, completing each other's abilities. Hotsuma's power was something called as "Voice of God" – meaning he could use words to destroy, to make flames appear.

That was what had happened two days ago – the Voice of God had gone out of control.

To ensure it wouldn't happen again, Hotsuma should learn to control his emotions – for someone as easy-going and open as Hotsuma, it wasn't going to be an easy task. But he had done it before multiply times in their previous lives – it wasn't impossible.

The children listened Takashiro's explanations – it was a massive amount of information to take in. Yet, even if it felt like they had stepped outside reality, it didn't sound that odd. Somehow, it was all familiar – in a way neither of them could explain.

Nevertheless, it was a shock, especially to Hotsuma. The boy was pale, fear written in his eyes. Until this, he had been able to pretend that nothing had happened. And even if he acknowledged that, he could still write it off as a coincidence.

No longer.

Those kids, his little brother, they had called him a monster. If he really could set people on fire, not only the Duras, didn't it mean that they were right then? That he was a monster. That as soon as someone would hear about it, they would treat him as one. That meant he was going to be alone.

For someone like Hotsuma, who was outgoing and loved people, it was the scariest thought of all.

Fuyutoki, just like Takashiro, could follow this line of thought, and was about to rise up and put his hands upon the child's shoulders. He was nothing more than a butler of Takashiro, the head of Giou clan, yes, but seeing a frightened child's expression was something that touched him, made him ready to offer few words of comfort – because that was all he'd be able to give.

But Takashiro stopped him, just by looking at him and shaking his head. Fuyutoki didn't even think about objecting – but even if he had such thoughts, they would've stopped upon following his master's eyes to the kids.

Shusei had taken Hotsuma's hands on his, calling out his friend's name to make the younger look at him. When Hotsuma did, he encountered a pair of sad, golden eyes, but filled with determination. "I promised you, didn't I? I'll stay with you."

Hotsuma bit his lip, hot tears burning behind his eyes again, threatening to rise up. "Shusei", was all he said before lunging himself on Shusei's thin arms. The tears were there, burning behind his closed eyelids, but he forced them to stay there.

Shusei wrapped his hands around his best friend, hugging him tightly.

The two adults watched the scene before themselves in awe. For Fuyutoki, it was the first time he saw how strong the bond Zweilt pairs shared truly was. Takashiro had seen it multiply times, one life after another, with these two boys and with others – yet it never ceased to amaze, how they were able to reach out for each other time after time, even without their memories.

That was the reason he sat in silence for a while, not speaking up, just letting the two drain comfort from each other.

But eventually, they would need to move on. "Shusei", he called out, catching the brunette's attention. "Shall I tell you about your abilities now?"

Shusei thought about it. Everything was confusing, everything was new and yet familiar, it made his head hurt – he suspected it was the same for Hotsuma. He wanted to know, but at the same time, he didn't want to.

Before he could make up his mind, Hotsuma lifted his head up, wiping his tears up on his sleeve. "Tell us", he told Takashiro. "I want to know."

Takashiro's lips tugged upwards as he watched Shusei to look first Hotsuma and then him, nodding. Some things never changed – the pair had always been like that. Hotsuma leading, Shusei following, supporting his partner from the shadows.

Shusei's power has harder to explain than Hotsuma's, because it wasn't as straight-forward. Ability was called "the Eyes of God" – ability to see things others could not – for example, he could easily find lost objects by using something reflecting.

Shusei nodded again, deep in thought. He had always been good at finding lost objects, but he had never thought it had something to do with mysterious powers. When he searched for something himself, he didn't use anything reflecting, but in a way, looked back to find the lost object. Maybe he could try to look into a crystal ball next time?

Takashiro let out a breath before rising up from his chair. It was time to bring the children home, to their respective parents. Who would keep getting paid for raising a Zweilt.

There were only 10 God-touched houses left in their clan – Giou clan being the head – two of which were Usui and Hotsuma – the houses were the two had been born this time. The transmigration of Zweilt souls were kept within the ten houses.

Both of the children' parents were aware what they had promised themselves into.

Hotsuma winced at the thought of going back home. "Why can't we stay? I don't want to go home…"

Takashiro shook his head. As things were now, it was impossible to keep the Zweilt together – first they would need to grow up a bit, and he would need to find some people to work in the mansion, other than Fuyutoki. He would need to locate the other Zweilts as well.

"That is impossible", he simply stated. "When you're older and everything's ready, you will move here." His voice left no room for complaints – this was how things would be handled. There was no other way.

Hotsuma didn't object even if he wanted to – he was smart enough to notice when the battle was lost.

Shusei, on the other hand, was deep in thought. Something was nagging on the back of his mind. "We really won't see you before that?" the brunette suddenly asked, looking at Takashiro.

The blonde man stared the child standing before him a while before closing his eyes and letting out a chuckle. He hadn't been thinking to tell to this part to the children just yet, but apparently he would have to – lying now wouldn't benefit anyone.

"You will", Takashiro admitted, gesturing the children to follow him and Fuyutoki towards the car. The rain hadn't ceased – it poured down from the grey sky mercilessly, trying to drown everything. "Next time, I'll bring you your rings. When you exchange them, you make a pact with each other."

It was a way to tie the pair t each other – by exchanging the rings, they would accept each other as partner. It would strengthen the bond they shared, and would make it possible for them to fight more effectively, for example, to use their weapons.

For children, without their memories, it didn't appear that way, though. Both of them blushed and averted each other's gaze, looking outside the car window of their own side.

"Like a marriage or something?"

Takashiro chucked again. Exchanging rings as a Zweilt pair wasn't exactly like that, and they wouldn't necessarily put the rings on ring fingers, but in a way, it wasn't far from marriage.

Useless to try to explain it to the kids, though. "Something like that."

There was a quack on the backseats as two confused, blushed kids tried to talk themselves out of it. Takashiro let the complaints flush through his ears, not really listening.

"Both of you will switch schools tomorrow", Takashiro told them as they dropped the kids off. With Hotsuma, the reason was crystal clear, and his parents hadn't objected in any way but rather happily agreed. Shusei's parents had simply asked for the way but otherwise showed no interest to the case.

Takashiro had thought about letting Shusei to going to the same school as he had, but eventually had decided against it. Even if the two were on different classes, it would be better for them to be around each other. It might've seemed cruel that he hadn't even asked Shusei's opinion of the matter, but in order to win the war against the Duras, opinion of one Zweilt hardly mattered. Besides, it was clear that Shusei wanted to be near Hotsuma, no matter what.

"Good luck", were the parting words he gave to the two.

The black car drove away, leaving the two kids to survive on their own. As the children disappeared from their view, Takashiro let out a sigh.

Truth to be told, he would've liked to gather all the Zweilts together already, even if there was no hurry. It would've been easier to keep tabs on them, but due to lack of resources, it was impossible. Takashiro knew and understood that because of Hotsuma's power going out of control, the kid was going to face quite a few hardships. Even with Shusei helping, it wasn't going to be rosy road.

As for Shusei – Takashiro was amazed that the kid had been able to somehow remember that they would meet him again before long. Shusei couldn't have any memories of the past, not yet, but apparently, they were lingering somewhere deep inside side mind – formless, for now.

When would they have form and how much would he remember? Takashiro didn't have an answer to that, since every life was different.

Despite the fact that everything he allowed himself to truly care about was winning the war, Takashiro couldn't help but feel sympathy towards the two.

Zweilt's path was never an easy one, and the pair already had had a rough beginning. It was promising a thorny, painful road – something no one would wish for.

Yet, it was an unavoidable destiny.


	4. Chapter 4 - Cold beyond the sun

_A/N: __I've been sick, hence the chapter is late. I'm sorry, hope you still enjoy. Also first mention of Yuki (of whom I've never really liked)! *le gasp*_

* * *

_Chapter 4 - Cold beyond the sun_

* * *

_You seem rather fragile  
__It's been said  
__It's cold beyond the sun  
__Have you ever been there?_

* * *

For couple of weeks, switching schools seemed to help – Hotsuma was able to make new friends in a record time, and even if his power scared him a bit, it seemed to be under his control. After all, Hotsuma worked a lot with it, especially with Shusei – it made a big difference to have a helping hand, even if that was no more than encouraging.

The situation changed after a month or so.

_A monster._

That was how the other kids started calling the blond kid – until one of the girls kindly pointed out that if they were mean to Hotsuma, he might burn them as well.

Of course, the teachers told the children to stop believing in such ridiculous rumors, but the damage was already done – the other kids were scared of Hotsuma, starting to distance themselves from him.

It would've been hard for any child, for any human being, but Hotsuma took it especially heavily – before all this mess, he had always been popular kid people liked. To make it worse, Hotsuma was a people person – he loved them.

Shusei did his best to be there for Hotsuma, but he was but just one person – no matter how he tried, it was impossible to make up for everyone else.

The situation slowly worsened – to some children, it wasn't enough to avoid the blond. Instead, they started treating him as he never existed – whether it was due to fear or confusion or just plain cruelty, it hardly mattered. Of course, that was an act they couldn't put up in class, in front of a teacher – but during breaks and after school it was easy.

It was the cruelest thing.

As the result, the only one who didn't treat Hotsuma like he was air or worse, was Shusei.

During that time, it was more often than not when Hotsuma came to Shusei's house. It became more frequent than neither of them would've liked – standing outside the Usui household, careful not to bother the parents, Shusei holding Hotsuma and the younger boy was gripping his hoodie, face buried to Shusei's shoulder, crying.

On one of these late evenings, Hotsuma was in pieces enough to voice the words he hadn't dared to ask, not even from his best (and only) friend.

"No one… will look at me…" he whispered, warm tears falling down on his cheeks, wetting Shusei's shoulder. "Am I… really here?"

"Hotsuma…" Shusei started, but his voice died as he tightened his hug. The brunette didn't know what to do, didn't know what to say to make it all right. Hotsuma was hurting so bad, the wounds in his heart were raw and open, bleeding – Shusei had no idea how to tend to them, how to close them, how to patch his best friend up.

"Shusei…"

It took years for Shusei to realize that his being there helped Hotsuma a great deal – it might've not have made it all right, but it made it a bit easier – possible – for Hotsuma to pull through the difficult times. What mattered was that Shusei was there when Hotsuma needed him.

It was enough.

* * *

That was how years passed by – both Hotsuma and Shusei growing up, practicing their powers by themselves and sometimes together, all on their spare time.

Hotsuma depended on Shusei to be there when he needed him, and Shusei was more than happy to be there. At least he could try to ease Hotsuma's suffering – even it was just for moment and just a little. Shusei was always there when Hotsuma needed him, but it had its price – no one on school understood why he an upperclassman spent his time with Hotsuma – with a monster.

The other kids didn't treat Shusei like air like they did to Hotsuma – the brunette was fairly popular at school, being a good and modest student, but a certain distance stayed between him and the rest. Besides Hotsuma, there was no one he would've called a friend, but it was alright. Hotsuma needed him, and he was there. It was everything he needed.

* * *

At some point, Shusei's classmates became daring enough to voice the question that had been bothering them for a long time now – why did someone as smart as Shusei spend his time with a monster?

Every time, Shusei's answer was simple and honest; _"You don't know him."_

Most of people let it go after a while, but every now and then, even after years, there was someone who just couldn't let it slide. Sometimes, it led to verbal arguments.

One of these arguments happened after school when Shusei was waiting for Hotsuma. That was when he passed by some of his classmates – a girl and two boys.

"Shusei!"

The boy turned to see the girl – she was pretty, her long brown hair falling down to her shoulders, blue eyes were filled with concern as she looked Shusei in the eye. "Why are you friends with Hotsuma? One wrong word, and he'll burn you, too."

Shusei shook his head, letting out a small sigh. He thought they had been through this, already. "He's not like that."

"But…"

"You don't know him." Shusei's voice wasn't cruel or cold – he was simply stating a fact. These people didn't know Hotsuma, and they never would.

"It's you who doesn't know him!" other one of the boys snapped, angrily glaring at Shusei. He was a little taller than Shusei was. "The kid he burned was my cousin's classmate!"

Shusei couldn't make the act undone – if he could've, he would've done it, no matter the cost. So he just met the accusing eyes of the boy. "He's my friend." He paused, letting the words sink in. "I know him."

Anger flared in the boy's eyes. He had met the kid Hotsuma burned. Whereas he hadn't really known the kid, he had still considered the boy as friend. The boy's hand closed into a tight fist as his anger level rose. "Why, you…" he started, stepping a couple threatening steps forward.

He was heavier than Shusei by build, and it was clear that should there be a fight, Shusei would lose – he didn't know how to fight after all, hadn't ever swung a fist at anyone. The brunette wasn't exactly scared, but he didn't want to get hit either – as the other boy stepped forward, he took a step backwards. Maybe he could outrun the other one? That didn't seem likely either, but it was the only option he had.

"Leave him alone."

Shusei turned upon hearing the familiar voice – Hotsuma stood there, glaring at the boy who was threatening his best friend.

That was all that it needed for the threatener to turn around and run after his friends who were already on their way to safety – he was scared of Hotsuma's reputation, scared that now he would be burned as well.

"Hotsuma…"

The blonde walked to him, still glaring after the idiot who had threatened _his _friend. "You okay?"

Shusei nodded as an answer, eyes following Hotsuma's – until the boy spoke, making Shusei to turn his gaze on him. "Yesterday, I decided." He paused, turning his eyes to Shusei. "You're my partner. I don't need anyone else."

_You do. You need Yuki._

The words just popped into Shusei's mind without any apparent reason at all – he had absolutely no idea who this Yuki was, or why would Hotsuma need her.

Pushing the thought back to the corner of his mind – it didn't make any sense, anyway - the brunette's gaze shifted to his hand. Tomorrow, they would meet Takashiro and exchange rings – to make a vow, a pact to be partners again, to fight alongside each other until the bitter end. The hand closed, decision made, and Shusei lifted his head to meet Hotsuma's gaze. "Me too."

For now, it was easy to shut that little voice inside his head whispering unwanted words about Yuki – Hotsuma was his partner, so there was no need to worry.

Shusei had no idea how wrong he was.


	5. Chapter 5 - Alive & live

___Beta: Tegthe  
A/N: __Shusei and Hotsuma finally exchange rings. And now I also have a beta! *does happy dance*_

* * *

_Chapter 5 - Alive & live_

* * *

_Alive  
__That's how I want you to feel tonight  
__Live  
__You're only here once, so do it well_

* * *

It was a beautiful, dark night with only the moon shining down on the earth, the night before the exchange of the rings, when Shusei dreamt of the past for the first time.

The dream wasn't clear – mostly, it was a mess of pictures, feelings and faces – people he didn't know, not anymore. When he tried to reach out for whoever was there, they disappeared like a smoke before his touch. One scene was clear, though.

_A girl walked past Shusei and someone else – or rather, she was supposed to just pass them, but when she reached them, she stopped. The girl was looking at them with sad eyes, wind playing with her bronze hair._

"_I'm sorry", she whispered, voice filled pain and sympathy as she reached out, her hand gently touching their shoulders. Whereas the other relaxed, Shusei flinched at the contact, even if he didn't dare to pull away._

_She let go quickly, and as she looked Shusei in the eye, her gaze was full of compassion and understanding – Shusei averted his gaze away quickly. Even if he wanted to protect the girl with all his might, he couldn't shake off the mixed feelings he had towards her._

_It felt like she could see right through him._

_The girl probably realized this as well – as she opened her eyes, she was about to say something, but was interrupted before even starting._

"_Yuki!"_

_She eyed the blond, long-haired man who was standing further away with his hand stretched out, waiting for the girl to return to his side, to her chambers. Yuki did as she was expected to, walking to man's side and then away, but as she went, she turned her eyes to Shusei for the one last time._

That was when Shusei woke up. He pushed himself to a sitting position rather quickly and closed his eyes, hand coming to his face as he let out shaking breaths.

He didn't understand the dream's contents, not really, but he felt awful – it was like someone's hand was wrapped around his heart, roughly clenching it. It hurt so much, and he couldn't even figure out why – he knew he had cared about that girl, hadn't wanted to flinch and hurt her feelings, but at the same time, he hadn't wanted to be around her.

Shusei closed his eyes and focused on breathing as he rested his hands on the white sheets, careful not to grip them. Dreams were nothing more than dreams – that was something that had been taught to him long ago. But back then, he hadn't known he had lived and died before, hadn't known that demons existed.

It had to be a dream of the past – nothing else could be so vivid and powerful. But who was that girl, Yuki? Why had that name popped up in his mind earlier in the day?

Letting out a sigh, Shusei lifted his gaze and stared forward, blindly, trying to calm his racing heart. Tomorrow – today if you took a better look at the time – he would exchange rings with Hotsuma. They would meet their leader, and should Shusei want to, he could ask Takashiro about Yuki, about the dream.

Yet, somewhere in his heart, Shusei wasn't sure if he wanted to know.

* * *

It was early morning, morning sun gently casting its golden rays on the Zweilts when Takashiro arrived with Fuyutoki, giving the rings to the boys, their rightful owners. The rings were silver, blank – if the pair's connection would be strong enough, the rings would accept and provide them with power. Should the rings reject them, nothing would happen – it wouldn't harm the pair, not physically but the mental part was another case altogether.

Takashiro didn't give them much instructions – he merely placed the rings on their open palms and told the two to go to a place that meant something to them. Somewhere where they could create their own momentary world and where no one would interrupt them. Takashiro would check on them on the day after tomorrow – he wouldn't be there to see how the two would exchange rings since it was a holy vow between just the two of them. It was for no one else – that moment would be theirs and theirs alone.

The boys only nodded, implying that they understood – after that, it only took seconds before Hotsuma gripped Shusei's hand and started leading him.

They passed by a couple of streets, all the way to a nearby forest where they used to play a lot when they were younger. More than that, it was also where they met for the first time in this life.

Through the woods they walked, passing small and big trees alike, until Hotsuma stopped under a huge, branched tree, eyeing up towards the sky. "You remember?" he asked, smile playing on his lips.

The older boy just nodded, refusing to be pulled back by a memory, as precious as it was – Hotsuma sitting on one of the strongest braches of the tree, Shusei sitting under it, his back laid on its trunk as the tree hid them both from the rest of the world, just for a moment.

Without words, Shusei opened his fist, looking at the silver ring resting there. Hotsuma stayed silent as he mirrored the motion – it was rare for him to stay silent, but somehow he felt that if he'd speak, the fragile spell of silence would break. That he would break the spell of something magical and bigger than the two of them, something that reached beyond time and space – he honored that soundlessly casted spell.

As the wind played around them, lifting the brown autumn leaves up from the ground to dance around the two boys, Shusei took Hotsuma's hand in his. Hotsuma's hand felt warm upon his cold fingers – Hotsuma was always so warm, both his body and the heart that was beating inside.

In silence, Shusei slipped the ring on the younger boy's right thumb before raiding his eyes to meet Hotsuma's. As silence wove its silver web around them, he couldn't help but lift that ringed hand to his own face, closing his eyes for a second, savoring the moment before letting go.

Shusei had never asked to which finger the ring would belong to – neither from Takahisro nor from Hotsuma. He just knew.

There was a slight flush on Hotsuma's face as he, without ripping the fragile web apart, took Shusei's right hand on his own and slipped the ring on his index finger.

Golden eyes met one of a kind, and smile rose to lips – warm, fuzzy feeling spread inside the two of them.

Now that they both had their rings, their fingers slipped between each other's – no words or gestures were needed – it was something that came to them naturally. Something that they had done some many times before.

Maybe it was just their imagination, but it felt like the wind around them grew stronger, creating a wall between them and the rest of the world. Warmth radiated from their rings as letters burned upon them, carving the owner's name and the Hebrew word AGLA – it stood for _Atah Gibor Le-olam Adonai_, translating as _"You, O Lord, are mighty forever"_ – into the metal.

Even after the rings stopped radiating the warmth and the wind slowly died, letting go of the leaves it had played with, the magic remained. It stayed there, long after the boys' gazes left each other's.

They were partners now.


	6. Chapter 6 - Don't ask

_____Beta: Tegthe  
A/N:__A quite short chapter, but somewhat necessary. After all, the boys need to know who Yuki is - and to do that, they need to meet Takashiro. Hope you enjoy!_

* * *

_Chapter 6 – Don't ask_

* * *

_Don't use a weakness  
Don't change the subject  
Don't ask the questions if you fear the answer_

* * *

It was a month after the two boys had gotten their rings when Shusei finally got his chance to talk to Takashiro. The man had come over to visit them at Shusei's place – the boy's parents were away, which gave them the perfect opportunity to talk in peace.

Not that his parents would've cared – they paid less and less attention to Shusei as he grew up. They had always known what they were raising – it gave them more funds, but that had never been their goal; once upon a time, they had wished to help the clan, wished to have a child of their own. But somewhere along the passing years, they had lost that love – for each other, for their child.

Takashiro pulled Shusei to the present. "I see that you have made your pact. Well done", the man said, looking upon the two Zweilts. It had been only a month since he had last seen the two of them, but years since he had really had change to talk to them. Of course, he had kept an eye on the boys, but hadn't interfered with their lives – it was still too early, and it was good for them to grow up in somewhat normal environment as long as possible.

Because Takashiro had carefully kept an eye of the two, he was aware of the hardships Hotsuma had gone through in school because of his powers. But the head of Giou clan hadn't worried too much about it – of course it wasn't pleasant, but the kid had Shusei.

Besides, things had started to get a little bit better recently – the two had started high school. The rumors of the fire years ago had faded away, and even if some of those children still went to the same school as Hotsuma, they didn't say anything about it in fear of looking ridiculous in their new classmates' eyes.

However, even if there was no more bullying, the incident had left deep scars on Hotsuma. The kid didn't let anyone but Shusei get close to him. Shusei on the other hand – well, he had always kept his distance.

"Have you been able to summon your weapons yet?" Takashiro asked as he took a sip of the coffee.

Hotsuma shook his head, blonde locks dancing around as he toyed with his earring, newly pierced. "Nah, not yet. But I know how it looks like."

Well, that was progress as well. Takashiro hadn't really expected either of boys to manage, not after a mere month. He turned his gaze on the older boy. "Shusei?"

The brunette closed his eyes, stretching his hands to his sides. Two light blue spheres, decorated with black crosses appeared above his hands, a faint glow radiating from them. Shusei opened his eyes, golden gaze directed on Takashiro. As Hotsuma stared in amazement, about to comment and praise his friend, Takashiro waved at him to stay silent. The simple task of calling the spheres still required great amount of concentration on Shusei's part.

"Can you get more?" Takashiro asked. It might've been pushing boy's limits, but then again, those spheres were the most important weapons Shusei had – with them, he would be able to trap a Duras in a cage and create a shield to protect them from attacks.

Shusei didn't answer, just closed his eyes again, focusing on the task.

Two more spheres appeared.

"If you can, go on", Takashiro encouraged, leaning back on his chair, joining his fingers. Those words resulted in glare from Hotsuma's part, but the boy didn't dare to stand up to Takashiro, especially since Shusei was up to the task and seemed to be doing fine.

For a moment nothing happened – then the glowing spheres started to float around Shusei, forming a fast moving circle around him. It wasn't what Takashiro had been looking for, but this was good as well – Shusei was able to control the movements of the spheres.

But it ended abruptly as the youth very nearly dropped to the floor – his knees would've hit the floor if Hotsuma hadn't moved fast and caught him by the shoulders.

"Shusei!"

"I'm fine." Shusei was breathing heavily as he touched Hotsuma's hand, trying to ensure the other boy that nothing bad had happened. He opened his eyes, offered the other boy a reassuring smile before lifting his gaze to meet Takashiro's.

The man nodded as an acknowledgment. "Good." He rose up from his chair, eyes on the two kids. "I suppose the swords are still out of question?"

Shusei diverted his gaze as he rose up as well – taking a little bit of support from Hotsuma who refused to let go. "Yes."

Takashiro nodded again – the boys had made more progress than he had expected, even if they were still a far cry from what they used to be. "Keep up the good work", he said, presenting his back to the boys, ready to take his leave. He made it almost to the door before Shusei called his name, not forgetting his manners as he did so.

As Takashiro turned, he was presented a question he hadn't expected.

"Who is Yuki?"

Apparently the memories were starting to rise up, at least with Shusei. It wasn't uncommon for Zweilts to start remembering their pasts, especially not in the form of dreams, but those dreams were usually vague. Before long, they would be able to tell names and some of the most emotional moments in their past lives – both good and bad, but human brain had an unfortunate habit to remember the worst over the best.

"Yuki is the Light of God", Takashiro told them. Now that Shusei had remembered even the name, there was no reason not to tell them – after all, Yuki was more valuable than any of the other Zweilts. "He's our lifeline. He is the only one able to heal the damage received from a Duras." He paused, letting the words sink in. "All of you Zweilts exist to protect him. It's in your blood."

"He?"

Both Takashiro and Shusei shifted their gaze to Hotsuma who shook his head, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with their undivided attention on him. "Uh, I mean…" He scratched his head. "I don't know. Isn't it a she?"

Shusei wasn't the only one struggling with his memories – Hotsuma hadn't seen the dreams as vivid as other boy, and he didn't remember anyone named Yuki. Not before this at least – the name rang a bell and made his chest tighten, but moreover, it sounded weird when Takashiro referred to Yuki as a 'he'.

The Giou clan leader chuckled softly, making a note not to underestimate the Zweilt's memory. "In this life, it's he."

With that, he turned his back on the boys again, waving his hand as he went.

The boys had still long way to go before they'd learn everything, but they were on their way.


	7. Chapter 7 - Walk through the fire

_______Beta: Tegthe  
A/N: ________Late, sorry, I know. (Blame my beta. Or don't - she's doing such a good work. :) As you can guess from the title of this chapter, we're finally getting into the real thing - slowly, but surely. Hope you enjoy!  
A/N2: Almost forgot - Lestatash asked in her review how old the boys are in previous chapter. Honestly, I'm nut sure - I kept the ages out because neither manga nor anime give specific information of when the rings are exchanged nor when Shusei gets his burns. But as I mentioned in the quite beginning of chapter 6, they had just started high school. I was hesitant to actually write the ages because of this lack of information.  
But wikipedia is kind enough to tell me that in Japan, junior high school covers the ages from 12-15, so I guess is roughly around that? High school itself starts after that, and it's mentioned both in the anime and in the manga that Zweilts go to high school. (I can tell you, I did a lot background work for this fic, but I forgot to do this one properly. Sorry for any inconveniences!) I hope this helped a bit!  
_

* * *

_Chapter 7 – Walk through the fire_

* * *

_I dare you to tell me to walk through the fire  
Wear my soul and call me a liar_

* * *

In the following years, Shusei and Hotsuma kept living a somewhat normal life – they went to school and studied like normal teenagers, but in their free time, they practiced their powers. The practice make them perfect, not yet, but eventually, the boys were able to call upon their weapons – even if they couldn't keep them materialized for long. For Shusei, the biggest problem was the control of his spheres – he could make them move as he liked, but he still couldn't create a cage, even if he remembered how it was supposed to look like.

Nevertheless, life was good. They had each other, and Hotsuma still had his parents – not once had they turned their backs on the kid.

But when everything seems to be going well, life has a habit of giving thorns instead of roses. That was the case with the Zweilt pair as well – when everything seemed to alright, it all suddenly went to hell.

It was just any other day when Hotsuma left for school – the only difference was that he had to return home during the lunch break to pick up his forgotten book. That was a great mistake – that was when Hotsuma overheard his parents' conversation.

"I can't take it anymore! I'm going to ask Takashiro to take him away!"

Hotsuma was at the outdoor, just about to close it, but halted his actions upon hearing something slamming against a wooden table along with his mother's yell.

"Please. Have more patience…" his father pleaded, trying to calm his wife down.

"For how much longer?" Her voice was filled with impatience, slowly rising the edge of anger beneath it – and there was a strange edge to her usually calm voice, something Hotsuma couldn't quite decipher. "Why should I live every day in fear?!"

Hotsuma's breath almost stopped, and he closed the door. He didn't want to hear more – then he wouldn't be able to pretend that everything was fine, that he hadn't heard anything. But as much as his brain told his legs to move, they were frozen in place – unwillingly, the boy heard the words that crushed his erratically beating heart to pieces. "If we trigger Hotsuma's temper even once… He'll burn us!"

"What…?"

"His strength is a desecration." His mother's voice was filled with loathing, hate, and that strange edge Hotsuma hadn't been able to pinpoint before – it was fear. She was scared him. Scared of her own son. "He's a monster!"

Hotsuma simply stood outside the door for a while – his legs didn't move even if he wished so. He could barely stand. As he were, he couldn't even hear the rest of his mother's shouting or his father's futile attempts to calm her down – his mother's previous yell repeated itself inside his head, not leaving the hurting youngster alone.

It was on that day that Hotsuma realized what his parents truly were after. It was the compensation they got as the parents of a Zweilt guardian – in exchange for raising a healthy child, they be paid handsomely.

But behind their smiles and nice words, there was fear.

Until that day, Hotsuma had thought that his parents cared about him – that they loved him.

It was a cruel mistake, enough to break an already deeply wounded heart of a teenager.

When his legs finally agreed to move, Hotsuma started walking towards the school, his mother's words playing over and over in his head. How could've he been so stupid? What had made him think that someone actually cared about a monster like him?

Hotsuma was awaked from his reverie by a familiar, caring voice.

"Hotsuma!" Shusei stopped in front of his best friend, slightly out of breath. Since Hotsuma hadn't been back by the time classes started, Shusei had gone far enough to skip his own – he couldn't have focused anyway, not with Hotsuma being god-knew-where. "What's wrong? You look so upset…"

"Shusei, I feel sick…" Hotsuma choked out – his chest hurt, he felt feverish and his stomach was turning. He felt like throwing up – like his stomach couldn't hold the breakfast he had eaten in the morning.

Shusei's placed his hands on Hotsuma's shoulders, worried golden eyes looking at him. "You're so pale…" The brunette quickly gazed his surroundings, spotting an empty bench nearby. "Come here, sit down for a while."

As soon as Shusei got the younger boy to sit down, he turned his back to the blonde. The brunette wanted to ask Hotsuma what was wrong – it was painfully clear that something bad had happened – but he didn't dare to push, afraid that he would break something. "I'm going to get you something to drink", he yelled over his shoulder. "Don't move!"

As soft footsteps disappeared, Hotsuma was left alone with his traitorous thoughts. _Why…_ he wondered, _…am I alive?_

"No one wants me", he heard himself saying to no one.

_I hurt my classmates. My parents and siblings are afraid of me. _It was true – there was no one in this world who wanted him. It was just like they said, he was a monster. And nobody could neither care nor love a monster. So what was the point living a life like that?

_My life… _The tears started pouring down. _…is worthless._

Hotsuma rose from the bench, tears streaming down on his face uncontrollably as he spoke to himself. "…Yes, it's exactly like that."

_It would have been better if I'd seen that from the beginning._

Hotsuma was too wrapped up in his thoughts to notice Shusei approaching with a soda can in his hand. To Hotsuma, the rest of the world hardly mattered – hell, he didn't matter himself. He shouldn't have been born in the first place. Not in this life, and probably not even in the previous ones – hadn't he always brought pain and suffering to those he cared about? Hadn't he always been a monster?

It would've been better that he hadn't been born at all.

_My existence is a crime._

He stood there, blankly staring forward, not seeing anything through his tears and pain clasping his heart. "Leave…" he spoke up.

"Stop!" Shusei yelled, his heart jumping all the way to his throat as he realized what Hotsuma was about to do.

"Disappear… Renjou Hotsuma."

Flames appeared out of nowhere to dance as they've been commanded, swallowing the blonde teenager.

_I will end this._

Even in the midst of the flames, the tears kept coming. As soon as they left his eyes, they dried up –the red flames swallowed them, wiping away their mere existence. Hotsuma found himself thinking that it didn't hurt as much as he thought it would – or maybe he just didn't feel the burn because the pain made by that white-scorching fire was still weaker than the burn in his heart?

"Hotsuma!"

The other boy didn't seem to hear Shusei, no matter how loud and many times he tried to call him. Never in his life had Shusei felt so helpless – his powers were weak compared to Hotsuma's, he was made for defense, but there was no barrier that would isolate Hotsuma from his flames.

Shusei felt his heart burning along with those flames. How was he supposed to live without Hotsuma?

There was no way. There was no life for him without Hotsuma.

Shusei did the only thing that made sense – some might've called him idiot and mad for it, but he didn't even give it a thought; he ran into that pillar of fire, hand closing around his partner's chest, gripping Hotsuma from behind.

That woke Hotsuma up – this wasn't real. There was no way someone – Shusei – would or should burn with him. "Are you crazy?" he yelled to make himself heard through the loud sizzling and cracking of fire as the flames licked them. "Let me go!" Even if he was the stronger one of the two of them, he couldn't shake Shusei off, or even turn around – the panic and adrenaline running through Shusei were far stronger than Hotsuma.

"You'll burn too!"

"No!" Shusei yelled, pale and slender fingers gripping Hotsuma's chest. "I won't let go!"

It was sheer desperation he drew his strength from – there was no way he was letting go of Hotsuma, letting him die. "Did you forget?! If you do this then we will never see each other again! Not even in the next life!" That was the scariest thought of all – life without Hotsuma wasn't a life worth living. Sure, he had lived some periods in the previous lives without the other – Hotsuma had simply died first – and all he remembered was it had been pure agony.

To live like that for the rest of the eternity… To be alone… No.

But if Hotsuma's pain was too great for him to keep on going, if Shusei wasn't enough of a help – of course he wasn't, the wounds in his partner's heart were too deep and Shusei possessed no power to heal them – then who was he to stop Hotsuma?

But he didn't want to let him go. Not by himself at least. "If you still want to die…" Shusei pressed their bodies closer together, so close that he was certain that Hotsuma could hear his heartbeat – he could hear his. "Then take me with you!"

Shusei closed his eyes, his other hand above Hotsuma's heart, feeling its beats. "Don't leave me alone here –" he whispered, the weak words barely hearable through the blazing inferno cradling them.

Hotsuma was in shock – he wanted to die, wanted to be free from all the pain, wanted to stop that blade stabbing his heart repeatedly, but… Did he want to take Shusei with him?

"Dammit…" he breathed out, tears still in his eyes as he touched Shusei's hands. The other boy's hands were always cold, but not now – the engulfing flames, dancing around them in the mixture of red, yellow and white, had taken care of that.

Back when they were kids, Hotsuma had promised to protect Shusei – but now, if he'd continue, Shusei would surely die with him.

He didn't want that.

The flames died as quickly as they had appeared.

Shusei dropped to his knees, pulling Hotsuma down with him, still refusing to let go. His own heart was still frozen by fear – even the full power of Hotsuma's flames hadn't melted it. His breath came out in short, near-panicked huffs – losing his partner for forever had been so close.

That was when Shusei started couching, tasting blood in his mouth – quick look to the hand that he had used to cover his mouth with confirmed that. Apparently the flame and heat had damaged his throat more than he had realized. Shusei felt his whole body growing sluggish and now that he was no longer protected by adrenalin he was starting to feel the effects his stunt caused to his body.

"Shusei?" Hotsuma turned around in his arms, sounding worried.

"I'm okay", Shusei weakly answered. It was kind of a lie – his body felt like there were multiply needles piercing his skin repeatedly. And it was worsening every moment, making his eyesight to disappear, making his mind blank, unable to register anything but the pain.

"Shusei?" The worry was evident on Hotsuma's voice, and panic was slowly starting to creep into it as well. If it weren't for the younger boy holding Shusei, the brunette would've dropped to the ground like a lifeless body.

"Hotsuma", Shusei breathed out. It was getting impossible to speak, to think – the pain was overwhelming his senses, blackness reaching out, forcing him to follow.

"Shusei!"

That panicked voice was the last thing Shusei heard before the world was swallowed by darkness.


	8. Chapter 8 - Change the season

_______Beta: Tegthe (Thank you again!)  
A/N: __Greet the hospital environment - something in which we're gonna spend a while in. Also greet the hours I spent on looking information about burns, their severity (which scar, which do not) and treatments. If there are mistakes on those, my apologies.  
Also, thank you for everyone who's reviewed, it really makes my day to see comments!  
________Anyway, here you go, hope you enjoy!_

* * *

_Chapter 8 – Change the season_

* * *

_They never knew how much a broken heart can break the sound and change the season_

* * *

When Shusei opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was a white ceiling. For a while, he didn't realize where he was or what had happened – until it all came crashing down.

The flames. Hotsuma trying to kill himself. The heat. The overwhelming feeling of panic. The pain.

_Hotsuma._

Shusei made an attempt to rise up from the bed where he was laying – he barely managed to get his back straight before a pained yelp escaped from his lips. It hurt everywhere.

"Don't rise up."

A warm hand was gently placed upon the brunette's shoulder, careful not to cause any unnecessary pain.

"But Hotsuma…"

"He's fine." Takashiro's free fingers – the ones not holding the boy in place – touched Shusei's chin, making the boy to look the older man in the eye. The leader of the clan looked exhausted – Takashiro's light bronze hair was falling down on his shoulders and his eyes were tired behind his glasses. But unlike before, when Shusei had been unconscious, now a small, reassured smile found its way on Takashiro's lips. "Unlike you, he didn't suffer any severe burns."

That was when it hit Shusei – he was wearing a white shirt and trousers and his body was partially bandaged. He was at the hospital.

The head of the Giou clan caught the youth's confused gaze, and as he let go of the boy's chin, he sighed. "Someone called an ambulance after you passed out. Both you and Hotsuma were brought to the hospital." Takashiro paused, taking his glasses off, putting them in his jack pocket. "When the staff finally got both your names from Hotsuma, they contacted your parents, who called me."

In reality, it had been a bit trickier than that – the hospital staff had wanted to see the children's parents' first, since they hadn't trusted Takashiro; relative or not, parents were always first. Plus, the staff had correctly suspected that Takashiro wasn't that close of a relative to the boys – not by blood. Hotsuma hadn't been able to be much of a help with that, still being too agitated, worried and scared.

In the end, it worked out – Takashiro had been the first one to arrive to hospital and he had been the one who managed to calm Hotsuma down. After dealing with the staff Takashiro had managed to get enough privacy for Hotsuma to give him a real explanation of the incident. And Hotsuma told him – how he had learned his parent's true feelings and how he had tried to kill himself – and how Shusei had flung himself within the blazing inferno, telling his partner to take him with him if he truly wanted to go.

It surprised Takashiro – he had been aware of Hotsuma's parents' feelings, especially his mother's, but he hadn't expected to boy to find out. But that hadn't been Takashiro's biggest mistake - the biggest mistake had been his own inability to predict how powerful effect it would have on the kid.

Takashiro hadn't ever thought that it would be enough to break Hotsuma's heart to pieces, to make him want to kill himself.

But thanks to Shusei's determination, things had worked out somewhat. Shusei was still on surgery, but the doctor hadn't been worried about his survival, just about the severity of the burns. But at least the two Zweilts were alive, and that was what mattered in the end.

After both Hotsuma's and Shusei's parents had come over, ensured the staff that Takashiro indeed was a close relative – it wasn't exactly the truth, but close enough – and after a brief discussion, it had been decided that they would change the custody of their children to the Giou clan leader.

Hotsuma's parents hadn't been eager to see their son, and the feeling was mutual. When the nurse had told the Hotsuma that his parents were in the hospital, the only answer she got was "I don't want to see them". That had been solved with that, and Takashiro had ensured the pair to go home, since they couldn't do anything here anyway.

Shusei's parents had been slightly more interested in their son – they had waited until it was possible to see him and afterwards asked the doctors if Shusei was going to be alright. After the doctor assured them that Shusei was going to be alright, despite the severity of the burns since he was young, the couple had also left for the night.

As the leader and guardian, Takashiro had decided to stay, telling Fuyutoki to go and start readying the papers for the custody change.

"Where's Hotsuma?"

Takashiro was pulled back to the moment as the boy before him spoke. Someone else than Takashiro would've found it odd that the teenager didn't ask anything about his parents, but about his friend. Despite his own condition, Shusei was still worried about Hotsuma. But then again, that was how he had always been.

"He just left for the bathroom, he'll be back in a few", Takashiro told Shusei. It was the truth – Hotsuma had claimed he had to go to the toilet at least. "As for your parents, they left earlier. They'll probably come here to visit tomorrow."

The brunette only nodded as answer, his mind reeling as he was slowly grasping the situation. Shusei knew that his body had gone through quite an experience - but the funny thing was that he didn't feel much of a pain at all, at least if he didn't move fast and unexpectedly.

Which meant he had to be pretty high on drugs.

That was when the door opened, and Hotsuma stepped in – or rather, stopped in his tracks in the doorway.

The blonde looked terrible – there were light bandages on his body as well, covering the burns. But that wasn't the worst part – the poor kid looked like he had been struck by a train. He seemed as exhausted as he was, both physically and mentally.

As Hotsuma saw Shusei sitting on the bed, awake, his eyes widened and life came back to them – whole range of emotions was seen within a mere seconds, all the way from shock to relief.

"Shusei!" the blonde hurried to the bed, hands slamming down on the bedside. It felt like he was dreaming – but not the nightmare it had been through the day. "Oh my god, you're awake, I was so worried…"

"I'm okay", Shusei answered, bandaged hand touching Hotsuma's hand.

Hotsuma's expression changed as he looked at the hand and then Shusei – the boy was wearing traditional hospital suit, but he could still see the thick bandages covering the slim frame. Hotsuma swallowed. He had caused that. He had caused Shusei to go through this, to suffer like that.

"Hotsuma?"

The blonde's eyes flickered to Shusei, only to sharply turn his head away – he couldn't look into those eyes, not at that honest, worried expression. "I…" It was his fault – his fault that Shusei was in hospital in the first place, that he was burnt, that those bandages were wrapped around his lithe form.

It was too much.

"I'm sorry", he choked out before turning and fleeing from the room.

"Hotsuma!" both Shusei and Takashiro called out for him, but it was to no avail. The kid had already fled from the room, disappeared into the hallways.

Shusei tried to get up, only to have another wave of pain crashing down on him. He wasn't able to read Hotsuma's mind, but based on what he saw in those golden eyes – pain, regret – he had a good idea. But as much as he wanted to reach after his best friend and partner, his abused body had another idea– it became clear as a pained yelp escaped from his lips.

Takashiro's hand touched Shusei's shoulder, causing him to whimper as the touch tightened on the skin near his shoulder and chest. It hurt, but he was still struggling against it, trying to get up.

"Shusei." Takashiro's commanding voice combined with a tight grip was enough for the boy to obey and look the Zweilt leader in the eye.

"I will talk to Hotsuma." Takashiro's tone left no place for arguments – Shusei couldn't have protested even if he wanted to. Some part of him understood – remembered – that Takashiro's orders were absolute.

The grip on his shoulder lessened, leaving only a stinging pain behind. "You might not feel it right now, but you've been through a lot today. The burns you got are severe." Takashiro didn't let Shusei's eyes to waver from his. The boy was smart, and despite the burn in his heart, he would need to act according to reason, not emotions, to get out of this situation as soon as possible. "They had to make two skin transplants on each side of your chest."

Shusei had gotten burns from all three degrees they were categorized in, third being the most dangerous. On third degree burns, the damage reached through all the skin layers, all the way to the muscles. That badly damaged skin wouldn't feel pain, but it was all the more dangerous. Of course, around it, there were also second and first degree burns, which were going to be more painful as little time would pass by – as for now, Shusei didn't feel much pain due to medication but without that, Takashiro had very little doubt that the boy would be screaming in pain if he weren't pumped full.

"You have to rest. Going after Hotsuma wouldn't help either of you", he told the boy, his tone still commanding. He understood the agony Shusei felt due to his partner's reaction, but running around wouldn't help. It would only make his condition worse, which would make the situation even worse.

That was something no one wanted.

Shusei lowered his head, pale fingers gripping the sheets. "I understand." What Takashiro said was true, he knew it was, but still…

"I will talk to him", Takashiro said again, this time rising up from his chair. Really, taking care of these kids was harder job than he had expected it to be – but it was his responsibility as the clan's head.

With that, Shusei was left in the sickly white room. He flopped himself down on the bed, wincing from the pain as he did so. Slowly he closed his eyes, letting the sleep to come and cover his exhausted and heavily medicated body.

_At least Hotsuma is safe_, was his last thought before the world of dreams closed around him, taking him into the cruel play yard of memories from another lifetime.


	9. Chapter 9 - Ashes

_________Beta: Tegthe (Thank you again!)  
A/N: __The first memory appears - those who have read my fics before may have noticed that I have a big bias when it comes to flashbacks; it's a playground made for me. Hope you like it too - and hope you won't mind Ayako. Just letting you know that I dislike OCs more than anything in fics - but Ayako just hopped in without asking my opinion, and well, I didn't have the heart to kick her out._

* * *

_Chapter 9 – Ashes_

* * *

_I'm swimming through the ashes of another life  
(There's no real reason to accept the way things have changed)_

* * *

_Snow was falling down from the darkening sky, painting the white world even whiter – it was like it was trying to chase away the black night that had fallen upon the world._

_Shusei was running up a high hill – the snow blurred his vision, making him unable to see forward. The icy path under his feet was slippery, making him to fall on his knees. He was able to stop the fall with his hands, but it made his hands hit the cold snow instead._

_A hiss escaped from his lips as the coldness shot through his palms and fingers, all the way up to his body, making it feel like his entire body was about to freeze. But he couldn't stop and give up here – otherwise they would lose yet another Zweilt._

_Shusei pushed himself up, making his way to the top._

_On the top of the hill, there was a young girl standing on the edge of deep gulley. She was wearing only a simple, long-sleeved black dress – it was by no means enough for the sickly cold weather, but she didn't appear to be freezing. She was looking down to the depths of the gully – wondering if this would be the best place to jump._

"_Ayako!" Shusei called out, stopping a few meters away, trying to catch his breath. He had run all this way, praying he would be able to reach her in time._

_She turned around, and the smallest of smiles – so sad that it was enough to break a person's heart – appeared on her face as she saw the other Zweilt. "Shusei", she spoke up, her delicate voice barely heard through the screaming wind. She pushed a runaway lock behind her ear as the cruel wind was playing with her long, dark brown hair, throwing it around in circles. "So it was you who found me." She chuckled, trying to get a control of the dark locks that were coming in her face. "I was sure it would be you or Tsukumo."_

_It was a natural supposal – Tsukumo was the "Ears of God" and Shusei was the "Eyes of God". Tsukumo's abilities provided him with the power to speak to animals and even hear people's true feelings – and Shusei could see what others couldn't._

_Shusei took one step closer, but stopped as she shifted even closer to the edge, away from him. "Ayako, please don't do this."_

_He knew she had lost her partner just a few days ago when a huge battle between the Duras and the Zweilt guardians had taken place – many Duras had lost their lives, and many of the guardians had been badly wounded, Hotsuma included, but Ayako's partner had been the only one to suffer a mortal blow during the battle._

_She shook her head as her grief-filled eyes locked with Shusei's. "You know, I still feel it's unfair. That Hotsuma survived and he didn't."_

_Shusei almost looked away from her pained gaze. Both of their partners had lost their lives, but Hotsuma had died later – Takashiro had been given the chance to perform a spell of reincarnation on him. Ayako's partner hadn't been that lucky. _

_They were both in pain, suffering because they had lost a loved one. The pain was there, wrapped around their hearts, breaking them to pieces like a glass shattering to shards. Yet they had to go on, wait for their time to die, to be reincarnated someday in the future again. To Shusei, it meant he would see Hotsuma again, but for Ayako… She would never see Shiba again. She would be alone for the rest of eternity._

_Takashiro wouldn't let her go and die, because it would mean one Zweilt less, one weapon less – less chance to win the war._

_It would make the efforts of their late comrades to go down with the wind, would make it so that their lives would've been nothing but a waste._

_Yet…_

"_It's okay", she spoke up, seeing the pained expression on Shusei's face. "It's not your fault. It's no one's fault."_

_It had been bad luck for Shiba and good for Hotsuma._

"_You understand, don't you? Why I have to go." _

_Shusei looked at the gully behind her – in the depths of it, there was a powerful floating river with tens of rocks in it. Should she jump, her body would be broken to pieces and flushed away – no one would find her again. She wouldn't be revived to a life without her partner._

"_Please." It was all Shusei could say – he had never been good with words. Hotsuma was the one to say what he thought, the one with the gift to put everything to words with raw honesty – Shusei didn't have that gift._

_Ayako flashed him a pained smile, understanding Shusei's mixed emotions – the boy didn't want her to die, to let the girl throw her life away, but he also understood her reasoning. "It's okay."_

_This way, she would be free from the eternal fight, would be free from the chains of fate. It was a selfish thing to do, but then again… In her own way, she had always been selfish. Ayako knew she couldn't live another life without Shiba – she loved him too much, and the scariest thing of all in the world – it was to be alone. All alone._

"_Could you live without Hotsuma?"_

_They both knew the answer._

"_So I thought." She paused, and there were tears in her eyes as she looked at Shusei. "Tell everyone I'm sorry." The tears falling from her eyes never reached the ground as liquid – when a tear reached the ground, it was already frozen, and upon impact, it broke into thousands of ice shards as it fell._

_Just like her heart._

_Shusei didn't look away as Ayako stretched out her arms, wind blowing around her, raising the fallen snow to join to the dance of those snowflakes around her. He watched as she stepped backwards, a broken and apologizing smile on her beautiful, tear-soaked face. "I hope you never have to live without him."_

_One more step, and she would fall. If Shusei would step forward now, he might still make it – he might be able to stop her._

_But he understood her pain all too well – when it came to their partners, they were very alike. Both Ayako and Shusei had always stood behind their partner, supporting them from the shadows, letting their partners steal the limelight – both in their lives and their hearts._

_They loved their partners too much to take back the place they once had – they didn't want their own place back anymore anyway – all they wanted was to be there for their partners, to be needed._

_Ayako couldn't, not anymore._

_Her purpose of living had died along Shiba – there was only pain and suffering left in this cold, dark world. Her heart, her very soul was as good as dead._

"_Goodbye and… thank you."_

_She stepped back, falling down from the cliff, to the depths of the dark abyss as the white snow fell down, painting the black night white._

* * *

Shusei woke up with a startle – the boy closed his eyes immediately upon waking up, blinking back tears. The dream had been so vivid he didn't even think about the possibility that it would've been just an ordinary nightmare – there was no way that it wasn't a distant memory from the past.

Now that he thought back, he remembered bits and pieces of that girl, Ayako, and her partner, Shiba. Shiba had been a very out-going person, and Ayako had to be the one babysitting him – but she never held him down too much, never chained the free spirit of Shiba down.

The pair had been married more than once, and if Shusei remembered right, they even had kids at some point. He didn't remember the children, or what happened to them, though.

Shusei also didn't remember how Shiba had been killed, or how Hotsuma had died in that lifetime – something he was silently grateful of.

"Ah, you're awake."

Shusei opened his eyes, just now noticing the person next to him, a middle-aged nurse with black hair and kind smile. She was checking his medication – after all, he was in intravenous therapy, having medication going straight to his veins.

The nurse touched his hand gently, pulling the boy's attention from the colorless liquid to her. "I have to wash your burns and change your bandages. For that, I'm going to add up a bit more medication, okay?"

Shusei nodded, understanding that even if he had refused, the nurse had done so. It was her job, after all.

As she added up the medication, Shusei could feel himself growing light-headed, making him wonder just how much drugs were being pumped into him. The nurse helped him into a different position so that it was easier to change the special bandages.

The brunette boy felt like he was watching the bandage change from somewhere afar – every time she rinsed the burns with water, it hurt, and every time the bandage came to slightly press upon the burns, it hurt as well, but not enough to make him more than wince. The nurse also changed the bandage on his thigh – there were no severe burns there, but it was the place they had taken the skin to use as a transplant from.

Because Shusei felt like he was an outsider, an observer, in his body, he didn't feel sick as the terrific burns were revealed. Any outsider would've felt that way though – the skin was more and less burnt, angry red with pink on the sides. On the worst ones, skin was partially black.

As she went on, she kept talking – trying to make Shusei think of something else – talking about her day, about her daughter who was going to the university – basically about anything else than Shusei's situation.

The nurse didn't voice her concern about his burns or how his parents hadn't visited today; neither did she mention the other kid who had been brought to the hospital with the brunette.

"Almost done", she told Shusei with a slight smile on her face, making sure to get Shusei's eye contact before continuing to treat his chest where the skin transplant was – where the worst burns had been. "This is going to hurt", she said, voice full of concern as she carefully took off the bandage.

Shusei whimpered at the touch, but the worst had just begun – as the nurse, even so carefully, washed his chest, where the skin transplant and the most burned parts lay, he cried out.

It felt like his skin was burning again, like it was being ripped into pieces and needles were stuck upon it – all in all, it felt terrible_, it hurt so much_.

"Shh", the nurse tried to comfort him even if she knew it was futile. According to her experience, touch caused by the pain was the worst one – surely, the skin transplant itself didn't feel much, but the skin around it, which had been brutally burned and now joined with new… It was enormous pain, especially for a young child. No matter what amount of medication she could give, it wouldn't take away all of the pain. And, of course, there was the phantom pain to which none of the medications worked for, since it was all inside the patient's head. It was a terrible, scary source of pain, but there wasn't much she could do about it.

Instead, she ignored the pained whimpers and soft yelps from the boy, finishing her job with care and with as much speed as she could master.

When the nurse finally let go, Shusei was breathing hard, tears falling down on his cheeks, pale, powerless fingers gripping the white sheets.

"Shh, boy", she whispered, hand touching the youngster's cheek, brushing his sweaty brown hair. "You'll be just fine." With kindness and care, she helped him to lie down on the mattress, whispering soft comforts.

She had been in this line of work for a long time, but it never stopped paining her to see the patients, especially the young ones, to suffer. She brushed Shusei's hair again, watching as the boy was slowly slipping to the world of dreams.

The nurse knew fully well that there was no need – nor resources, according to the decision-makers – for her to stay there and watch the child fall asleep after the tiring and painful operation. She wouldn't have needed to sit there and brush the kid's hair like this, but his parents weren't here. To the boy, right now, there was no one beside him.

She couldn't leave him be, not like this.

So until the world of dreams closed around the boy, she stayed, work-hardened fingers ran through the brown locks, providing comfort – it was all she could give.

Little did she know that it was the first time in ten years that someone cared so much about the kid.


	10. Chapter 10 - Fall apart

_________Beta: Tegthe  
A/N: __I've had a couple of questions of how old the boys are - I think this takes a place about 1-2 years before Yuki actually arrives. And before anyone asks, I'm aware that in manga, everyone calls Takashiro "Takashiro-sama", but I've never been a fan of using honorifics in fics. So I'm working my way around them. (Plus, I think that hundreds of years ago, they would've spoken to him with even more respect.)  
I was also asked what Hotsuma has been doing - well, I think Takashiro answer to that here.  
And we're already at chapter 10! (And still have a long way to go - good or bad, I'm not sure. :')) Hope you enjoy, don't forget to let me know that you exist (aka review, if you will). Long A/N is long, now off you go with the chapter!_

* * *

_Chapter 10 – Fall apart_

* * *

_What ever happened to the young man's heart  
Swallowed by pain, as he slowly fell apart_

* * *

_The white world was covered in crimson. Snow was falling from the sky, painting the world white, but on the ground where it lay, the white color of snow was overpowered by crimson red._

_Blood. It was everywhere, covering the snow, silently proving how tough the battle had been this time._

_Shusei was on his knees on the ground, the paired swords lying close. He was next to his unconscious partner, checking the pulse, praying that the gods wouldn't take his partner away from him, not like this._

_For once, his prayers were answered – the pulse was there, even if it was faint. The amount of Hotsuma's wounds – bruises, deep, deep cuts – was alarming, just like the amount of crimson snow around him._

"_Shusei! Hotsuma!"_

_The youngster's gaze snapped to the silver-haired boy running towards them. Just like Shusei, he was also covered in wounds, but none of them were too serious. "Thank God, you're alive."_

_Shusei nodded, eyes shifting back to his partner. Anyone else couldn't have known that both of them were alive – but Tsukumo could, being able to hear their heartbeat. He was the 'Ears of God', after all. "Barely."_

_Tsukumo nodded as well, hand coming to rest upon Hotsuma's chest, his expression full of worry. "Toko went to get Yuki and lord Takashiro."_

_Shusei nodded absentmindedly again, eyes briefly meeting the other boy's as his fingers ran across Hotsuma's body, trying to locate the worst wound, the one that was still bleeding, rapidly changing the color of the snow from white to red. "How are the others?"_

_Tsukumo's hands closed into fists. "We lost Shiba."_

_The brunette youngster's hands stopped for a second. Shiba was one of the strongest among them – it felt unnatural that he would've fallen, even if they had had to fight against so many Duras'. More than that, before getting separated during the battle, he and Hotsuma had fought alongside Shiba and Ayako. At that time, Shiba had taken one hit for Hotsuma, saving the younger boy's life. It hadn't been a major wound, but a wound nonetheless. Besides that, the pair had been fine – if not for a few minor cuts. After that, they had gotten separated, and now Shiba was dead._

_Despite not having seen the end of the fight, Shusei couldn't help but feel that it had been partially their fault – the wound must've slowed Shiba down._

_Shusei was pulled back to the moment when he lifted Hotsuma's shirt to see the worst wound – a cut on his side. Both Shusei's and Tsukumo's eyes widened in horror as they saw the wound – it was a deep, wide cut going from the blonde's side to his abdomen. It went all the way down to the bones and muscles, blood gushing out of the fresh wound, painting the snow red._

_Tsukumo pulled Hotsuma's shirt downwards from his shoulder, revealing another horrendous cut there. It wasn't as long as the other one, but it was also deep, all the way to the muscles._

_Those two horrendous wounds, combined with the other cuts… Shusei couldn't breathe._

_That was when Toko came running, Yuki and Takashiro by her side, looking relieved to see everyone alive._

_Their relieved expressions turned into horror in less than a second as they saw Hotsuma's wounds. Toko's hands flew to cover her mouth as she stopped in her tracks, not being able to move forward._

_Yuki didn't waste any time as she moved next to the Zweilt pair, knees softly hitting the snow as she dropped herself down to Hotsuma's side to have a better look at his wounds. She might not have spent much time around them, but she cared for them – she was much like their mother, their lifeline._

_She didn't need to examine the youth for long before an unsure word left her mouth as her eyes shifted from the unconscious youth to Shusei. "I…"_

_Shusei didn't need to hear the rest of the sentence. The apologizing, agonized and sad look in her golden eyes told him everything he needed to know._

_The others couldn't follow so fast though. Yuki turned towards Takashiro, unsure of what to do. She wanted to try, never mind what would be the state of her own body after that, but… "It's too much", she said, voice barely above whisper._

_Shusei's hands closed into fists on Hotsuma's chest as he lowered his head and squeezed his eyes shut, fighting back tears. He didn't want this to happen, not again._

_Takashiro bit his lip. As he closed his eyes, he let out a sigh. This was pleasant for none of them, especially since they already lost Shiba, but there was no way they could risk Yuki. Not when the war was as flashy as it was._

"_Heal him a bit", Takashiro ordered. "So that he can make it through the resurrection ceremony."_

_Yuki nodded, turning her attention back to Hotsuma. She put her hands above the wound on his shoulder. A warm, golden light emitted, healing the wound slowly. When she was done with the first wound, she moved to the next – she didn't heal the wounds completely, but enough to stop the flow of blood. Hotsuma wouldn't make it far, but he would make it until Takashiro would be finished with the ceremony – then Hotsuma's soul could be called back when the time would come for them to fight again._

_Shusei watched Yuki work her magic, mind blank of thoughts. He didn't notice how Tsukumo got up and walked over to his sister. Shusei missed how Toko was crying against his brother's shoulder and how Tsukumo was blinking back his tears as well._

_Shusei didn't cry. He was numb, couldn't feel a thing. Hotsuma would be robbed from him once again._

_He didn't speak as they carried Hotsuma back to the village, to the holy building where the ceremony would take place. After they entered the building and carefully laid Hotsuma down, Toko took his hand._

"_Come on, let's get your wounds healed." Her eyes were filled with tears as she spoke, sadness evident in her voice as well. Like her brother, she was battered and bruised – the battle hadn't been easy for either of them._

_Shusei didn't move however, but looked at Takashiro. "My lord", he spoke up, catching the man's attention. "Could I… Is it possible for me to stay?"_

_It was the first time he pleaded for that – many others had begged for it as well, wanting to stay beside their partner until the end. But unlike others, Shusei had never asked for it – even if Hotsuma had usually been the one to die before him. He knew how important the ceremony was and understood that even the smallest mistake, caused by an outsider, could cause for it to go wrong and as the result, Takashiro wouldn't be able to call the Zweilt's soul back again._

_Takashiro studied Shusei for a while, weighing the risks in his mind. "Yes", he finally answered, turning his back on the brunette. It was rare for Takashiro to allow attendance at the ceremony – he had made some exceptions in the past, but they were few and far between. Shusei didn't know what moved their leader enough to let him stay – as long as he stayed silent and kept out of the way of course – but he was grateful for it._

_After the holy ceremony, they moved Hotsuma to another room. Shusei made the decision to stay in the room and stay beside his unconscious partner until the end. No one denied him, but the Murasame siblings – Tsukumo and Toko – asked if he was sure and if he wanted company. Shusei appreciated their concern, but he knew what he was doing, and wanted to be alone with Hotsuma._

_Yuki stayed with him for a while though – Takashiro had ordered her to heal the wounds of those Zweilts who survived, Shusei included._

_The warm, golden light emitted from her hands as she worked, slowly healing most of Shusei's wounds. They stayed silent as the night closed in on them, the only source of light in the room being the candle and her magic._

_Shusei barely noticed when she was finished – his mind was on his partner, wondering how long it would take for Hotsuma's breath to stop. It was a frightening thought, to let him die again. One would've thought that he and the other Zweilts would've gotten used to it by now, after so many wars and deaths, but it was just as terrifying every time. Time after time, it still broke your heart, even if you knew that you were going to meet your partner again._

_When Yuki was finished, she sat beside Shusei for a while, observing the youth. Like always, Shusei couldn't tell what she was thinking – she was the clan's princess, who kept her distance from them, yet they still longed for her, wanted to be beside her – it was something that was written in their blood._

"_I suppose you want to be alone with him?" she finally spoke up, softly._

_Shusei nodded, averting his gaze. It unnerved him how it felt like she could see through him, through all the barriers he unconsciously built._

_Yuki's white dress rattled a bit as she stood up, moving to the door. As her hand reached the doorknob, she partially turned back to look at the Zweilt. "I know how you feel."_

_Yuki's eyes captivated Shusei's as she spoke. "It's the scariest feeling in this world. To be all alone."_

_With that, she left the room, leaving Shusei alone with his dying partner. After the door closed, Shusei laid his head above Hotsuma's heart, listening to the weakening beat. He could feel the warmth starting to escape, could feel how the life was leaving from his partner on every second that ticked by._

_He missed the warmth that Hotsuma was always radiating – Hotsuma was the one made from fire whereas Shusei was made from ice. They were almost polar opposites, yet Shusei was drawn to his partner in every single lifetime. Maybe it was because Hotsuma alone was able to melt the icy barriers he built up, time after time?_

_Shusei didn't know how long he stayed like that – just feeling and listening, waiting for the inevitable, yet praying it would never come._

_When the sound of the heart beat finally stopped, Shusei opened his eyes, pushing himself upwards. He looked at his partner's calm face, hand resting above the once-beating heart. As his hand closed into a fist, a tear dropped down on Hotsuma's chest._

_Shusei squeezed his eyes shut as a broken sob escaped from his lips. Slowly, he rested his head on Hotsuma's chest again, letting the tears fall._

_He was supposed to be Hotsuma's partner, was supposed to protect him, yet he always let him down. Hotsuma always died before him, he was never able to help him, even if he would happily give his life for him._

_Maybe it was better this way though – at least Hotsuma was never left behind with a broken heart. He didn't need to watch his loved one die and feel how his own heart died with him, but the body kept on living. He didn't have to be left alone._

_Because, like Yuki had said, the most terrible thing was to be left all alone._

* * *

Shusei woke up covered in sweat, feeling like his heart was about to burst. The dream – a memory – was so vivid. He remembered the horrible feeling of his heart being reduced to ashes, the all-consuming fear and pain of being alone.

"A nightmare?"

The brunette youth didn't even glance to his side to see the light-bronze haired man sitting there. Shusei lifted his hand to cover his eyes, but a burst of pain on his chest when he did so made him cry out and give up on the idea. So, instead he squeezed his eyes shut, holding back the tears the memory – more like a nightmare - had called up.

"Memory", he spoke out, ignoring the lump in his throat. "I saw Hotsuma dying."

He could still see the crimson blood splayed on the white snow, could still feel the warmth escaping from his partner, could still hear how his heartbeat weakened and eventually, stopped.

Takashiro didn't have much to say to that – the Zweilt had died and watched each other die so many times that it should've gotten easier by now. But maybe it was natural for them to still struggle with it – at least it meant they hadn't lost their humanity during the lives they had lived through.

It was a cruel fate – to be reborn and be forced to fight the same fight over and over again, without the end in sight.

Shusei was just about to ask about his partner, but there was a knock on the door. The nurse from yesterday stepped in, greeting Takashiro with a kind smile on her face, telling that it was time to switch the bandages again.

Shusei winced at the mere thought, but didn't protest.

"I would like to stay, if possible", Takashiro pleaded, making his request clear.

"Of course."

Takashiro watched as the nurse went through the same routine as yesterday. Even if Shusei was now more prepared to the pain that the procedure brought, it didn't make things any easier. It still hurt like hell, and the drugs couldn't take the pain away.

When she was finished, Shusei laid down to the mattress again. As he stared at the white roof, he was trying to blink back the tears that were slowly running down on his cheeks. He was exhausted, mentally and physically – the memory had left his emotions mixed, making it feel like his heart was crashing, and the newly brought physical pain of the burns didn't make anything easier. All in all, there was nothing but pain.

The nurse left, leaving Shusei in Takashiro's care, counting on the man to take care of the poor boy. "Take care of him, will you?" she said at the door. "His parents still couldn't come."

When the nurse left, Takashiro turned his attention to the suffering Zweilt. "It's not your parents you need, right?"

Shusei shook his head. His body and heart hurt – he wanted to see Hotsuma, to see that the other boy was alive, not the lifeless body that had been in his memory. "Where's Hotsuma?"

Takashiro let out a breath. He had been trying to convince the kid to go and talk to Shusei, but his words had all fallen on deaf ears. Hotsuma was so scared of the fact that he had hurt his best friend and partner that he refused to see Shusei. It was painful for him to come face to face with that fact, and somewhere deep inside his mind, he feared that now Shusei would be scared of him as well.

But how to bring that up to a kid who wanted nothing more than to see him? Takashiro might not be a loving person, but he still had a heart.

"He's still struggling with himself", Takashiro finally said, looking into pained eyes. "I'll talk to him again."

It wasn't enough for a comfort, not by far, but it was all he could provide at the moment. Just by looking into Shusei's eyes, the Giou clan leader could tell that the kid was scared – scared that he had just lost his partner.

"Go to sleep", Takashiro mumbled, absentmindedly touching Shusei's hair, trying to provide some kind of a physical comfort – something he hadn't done in hundreds of years. "It'll be fine."

It sounded like an empty promise, but Shusei hanged onto it as he closed his eyes – he hadn't anything else left, anyway.


	11. Chapter 11 - Shed some light

___________Beta: Tegthe  
A/N: ____Sorry for taking over a week to put this one up, but real life and school were on the way of beta-reading. That happens, but still, my apologies. Of the chapter... Have I ever mentioned that I like Takashiro (as a character) a lot? To me, he seems like a somewhat caring character - in his own way, even if the winning of the war always, always, comes first. But I can't think that he doesn't care about the Zweilts - I mean, how could you not, watching them fight and die for you, over and over again? When I was rereading Uraboku again for this fic, and ran into the quotes (and scene) I pulled to this chapter and started thinking who would've actually said something like that to Hotsuma, I couldn't think of anyone but Takashiro.  
Hope you enjoy! (After all, this is the first (and last?) non-angsty (happyish) chapter in a while!)_  


* * *

_Chapter 11 – Shed some light_

* * *

_And shed some light on me  
And tell me something that I'll believe in_

* * *

After two more days, Takashiro had had it. The boys had been dancing around each other – it wasn't that he didn't understand, but he had others things to take care of as well. Hotsuma was still overcome with guilt, only visiting Shusei when the other boy was asleep. Shusei, on the other hand, spent most of his days in the bed, sleeping, plagued by nightmares.

Takashiro rarely took a stance between the Zweilt relationships – it was something each pair was supposed to take care of by themselves. It was their private issue, so he usually stayed out of it, but as the things stood between Shusei and Hotsuma right now…

As the leader of the Giou clan, he couldn't let it continue.

So the man looked for Hotsuma, finding the kid sitting on the floor in his hospital room, eyes looking outside the window but not really seeing the landscape – his mind was elsewhere, as rare as the occurrence was.

"Go to your partner", Takashiro said, closing the door behind him as he entered – this was a conversation for no one else's ears.

Hotsuma didn't even turn to look at the bronze-haired man. "I can't."

"Hotsuma, this is an order." Takashiro's voice was strict, not allowing any objections.

But Hotsuma disagreed, and wasn't afraid to say so. Angry, golden eyes snapped to Takashiro. "I can't! Shusei is in that state because of me!" He paused, wiping his eyes on his sleeve, angrily pushing back the tears that tried to rise up. "I've hurt so many people. Even my parents are scared of me. And now I hurt Shusei…"

It was ironic. Hotsuma, who had tried to kill himself with his own powers, with his very own flames, had only suffered minor wounds, but Shusei, who had stopped him, had some very severe burns – especially the ones on his chest were bad, because that was where he had held Hotsuma tightest. Shusei had been afraid that should he let go, Hotsuma would leave him – leave him alone for eternity.

"I can't possibly face him!" Hotsuma dropped on his knees, palms hitting the tiles, hands closing into fists as one rebellious tear dropped to the white floor. He couldn't, it was just impossible.

Takashiro let out a sigh. When did he become an advisor, a parent, instead of the leader? "If you think it's a crime", he started, watching the pathetic figure on his knees before him, "that you hurt all those people…" Hotsuma still wasn't looking at him, but there was no need for it. Takashiro knew that his words, as cold and uncaring as they sounded, held truth, and it would reach Hotsuma's mind and heart. Because in the end, what the boy wanted the most was to atone. To be forgiven, not by Shusei but by himself. He wanted to make up for what he had done. "Then stay alive and make it better, even if you have to crawl on your knees –" In the end, none of them was more than a pathetic human being, struggling to survive and to live on. "No matter how painful it's going to be!"

With that, Takashiro turned his back on the boy, glancing over his shoulder as he reached the door. "Shusei is your partner. He needs you. Are you really going to turn your back on him because he saved your life?"

With that, Takashiro was gone, leaving Hotsuma alone with his traitorous thoughts.

* * *

On that night, Hotsuma slipped into Shusei's hospital room. The blonde halted his steps after closing the door, just staying there and watching his partner. As Shusei lay silently on the bed in the dark room, the only light being the moonlight that came from the window, Hotsuma couldn't help but finally realize how fragile the brunette actually was.

Slowly, Hotsuma walked besides the older boy, looking at the bandaged body. Shusei was his partner, alright. And he had… He had hurt the one person he was supposed to protect. His hand almost touched Shusei's chest, he almost ran his fingers across the bandages, but pulled back. How could he ever look at Shusei again? How could he ever atone for what he had done?

"Hotsuma?"

Shusei's voice pulled the blonde boy back to the moment. Shusei lifted his hand, long, pale fingers tracing Hotsuma's face. "You're really here." Shusei closed his eyes briefly, before opening them again, looking Hotsuma in the eye. "I thought you were a dream."

Hotsuma couldn't think of an answer – he was taken aback by the look in Shusei's eyes. The other boy was genuinely happy that he was here, alongside him. Unlike Hotsuma had imagined, there was no fear in Shusei's expression – the brunette youth looked at him like he always had.

No, that wasn't the case – Shusei's expression was more unguarded than before. Despite the amount Shusei spent sleeping, he still looked exhausted, drained. More than anything, it was clearly visible how much he had been suffering – how much he needed Hotsuma.

"I'm sorry", Hotsuma choked out, taking Shusei's bandaged hand into his, pressing it against his own cheek. Exhaling slowly, he could feel the warmth from Shusei's hand – it was relatively cold, especially compared to Hotsuma's, but there was still warmth of a living being. "I…"

"Shh." Shusei's fingers cradled Hotsuma's, and his fingers slipped between his. "You're alive. That's what matters." His eyes were warm, like he was content just because Hotsuma was there.

It was something Hotsuma couldn't understand. He had hurt Shusei so badly, how could the other boy look at him like that? How could he still want him – a monster who brought nothing but suffering to those around him – beside him?

"Stay?" Shusei's voice was nothing but a whisper, carrying over his feelings.

Hotsuma lightly gripped his partner's hand, careful not to cause any pain. "Yeah."

"Promise?" Shusei hated himself for being so weak, so selfish and needy when Hotsuma was still in pain himself, but to Shusei, it still felt like a dream. He was afraid that if he'd fall asleep, Hotsuma wouldn't be there when he'd wake up. He still feared that he was the one who had fucked up, and was losing his partner due to that.

"I promise." Hotsuma promised himself that he would do as Takashiro told him – he would stay alive and crawl on his knees if that's what it would take to make it better. For Shusei.

It was how their partnership was – to need and to be needed.

Shusei closed his eyes, tugging Hotsuma's hand. It was the first time after the accident when he let himself think that maybe, just maybe, everything would turn out alright.

On that night, as Hotsuma stayed beside him, there were no nightmares.


	12. Chapter 12 - I still believe

_____________Beta: Tegthe (Thanks again!)  
A/N: __I'm not sure what to say of this chapter. I can't say it's necessary for the future, but I wouldn't call it unnecessary either. If you want to take a thought about this chapter, take it on what's said about humans here, and the mentality Shusei is slowly starting to build. (If you can't see it yet or disagree with me, I don't mind. I hope you still enjoy the chapter though.)  
And now that I remember; thank you for those who have commented, it really makes my days and motivates me to go on._

* * *

_Chapter 12 – I still believe_

* * *

_If I drown tonight, bring me  
back to life  
Breathe your breath in me  
The only thing that I still believe  
In is you_

* * *

The nurses weren't too happy to find Hotsuma in Shusei's room on the next day – if they were strict about something, it was about patients staying in their own rooms.

But as the days went by, they eventually gave up – every morning, they found the blonde boy in Shusei's room, sometimes sleeping on the floor next to the bed, but more often than not, the kid was somehow sprawled on the chair, head and upper body on the bed.

No matter how angry the nurses wanted to stay, they couldn't stop the small smile making its way on their faces as they were welcomed with the same scene one morning after another.

Hotsuma was still recovering himself, so the nurses let him stay – besides, Takashiro had paid the costs keeping both of the boys in hospital, so it was fine. The head of the Giou clan was smart enough to figure out that keeping the pair away from each other would do nothing but harm – by staying close to each other, they were healing one another. Even if it was just for a bit, just for a passing moment, it was enough to keep them moving forward.

Not that they had an option to go back either.

What the nurses stayed strict about was that Hotsuma wasn't allowed there as they treated Shusei's wounds – according to them, it wouldn't do any good for a growing child to see such horrible things. None of them knew – or believed at least – that it had been Hotsuma who had caused those burn marks. But in the end, the only thing that mattered was to keep the boy from seeing his best friend's wounds. Neither Shusei nor Takashiro minded – it was better this way, better for Hotsuma not to be reminded even more of what he'd done, not to be reminded of the monster that lay within.

Shusei himself still had hard time with the wounds – despite the heavy medication, there was still pain. To the surprise of the nurses, he didn't evolve such strong fear towards the treatment as the patients usually did – surely enough, he still flinched away from their touches, wished the gentle fingers to go away, because they brought nothing but pain. Some of it was phantom pain, Shusei knew that, but it was still hard to fight against an unseen enemy – but it helped to know that he still had his partner.

"How long do you think it will take before he can be moved?" Takashiro once asked the elderly nurse that had been taken Shusei as her patient – she was more around him than any of the others. Whether it was the policy of the hospital or out of her own feelings, the brunette didn't know, but it was a bit easier not to be touched by a stranger one day after another. Of course, he still didn't know the lady – didn't even care much to know her – but he could appreciate the warmth and gentle care she was willing to give.

It was something Shusei's own mother had never given to her own son, at least not that Shusei remembered.

Upon seeing the unpleased look on the lady's face, Takashiro explained himself further – he had no plans to push the kid to do something his body couldn't be able to take. "We have a family doctor. I wish to take the boys home as soon as possible."

None of it was a lie – but Takashiro knew how to use words to dance around people. He had been living hundreds of years, mastering that skill – being around naïve humans wasn't that pleasant, but it was better when you knew how to play them.

The nurse gave a worried look in Shusei's direction, and then locked her eyes with Takashiro. "Is he specialized in burn wounds?" she asked skeptically.

"No", Takashiro admitted, powerful golden gaze never leaving the woman's as he crossed his legs, throwing the right leg above the left. His entire figure was straight, his aura emitting power – whether it was intentional or not, Shusei didn't know, but it was certain that no normal human being would be able to take a stance against his will. "But he knows what he's doing. He's a very good doctor, I assure you."

The nurse still looked skeptical as she turned her gaze away when she took the lotions and left-over bandages to her arms. "In that case… I would estimate three, four more days." She gave another look towards Shusei's direction, before looking at Takashiro again. "But I am not his doctor, you have to discuss about this with him."

"Of course."

She lowered her head a bit, giving a nod to the bronze-haired man and as she reached the door, she gave a soft smile to Shusei before leaving the room, leaving the two alone.

For a while, they were silent before Takashiro rose up on his chair, pulling his long beige trench-coat on, readying himself to leave. Now that things between Shusei and Hotsuma were mostly fine, he could again attend to the main business – to look over Yuki and focus on finding the Duras and Reiga, their main enemy. "I will talk to the doctor. It would be for the best if both you and Hotsuma comes to live in the main residence as soon as possible. Here you are an easy target for the Duras. We don't want any unneeded battles, especially when you're in no condition to fight." He paused, looking into the young Zweilt's eyes. "And this place isn't improving your relationship."

Shusei inwardly winced at the notice, casting his eyes to the ground. He was doing better with Hotsuma now, compared to week or so ago – they could stay in the same room, but it wasn't like they had talked about the incident. Not that they talked about anything, really. A lot of the reason was to do with the fact that Shusei spent most of the days sleeping – his abused body needed much rest in order to heal – but it still didn't erase the long silences between them.

The brunette wanted to believe that it was because the incident was still fresh in their minds, but he feared that wasn't the case – after all, Hotsuma was still tiptoeing around him. But he wanted to believe that after they left the hospital and he would be healed, they could put the whole nightmare behind them.

Shusei knew it was a childish, naïve belief, but he still wanted to believe in it.

As for the rest Takashiro had said… Shusei hadn't even contemplated on the thought of Duras appearing and trying to kill them. The Duras rarely attacked Zweilts – if they weren't under Reiga's command, that was – but that was mostly due to the fact that the guardians weren't easy to find. But since the incident of them getting burned wasn't exactly a usual case, it could very well be that the Duras took an interest in it, even if Takashiro had managed to keep the police and media out of it. After all, most of the lesser Duras lived in hosting human beings, just like parasites. This meant they had free access to the human world – as long as there was a person with darkness in his or her heart.

And who was so noble that he didn't carry any darkness in their heart? No one, absolutely no one. Every single human bore some kind of darkness in their heart – whether it was revenge, loneliness, sadness or pure hate, it didn't matter. As long as humans existed, the darkness did too.

Shusei was so lost in his thought that he didn't even notice Takashiro leaving the small room. The head of the Giou clan was right – should a Duras attack the Zweilt pair, they wouldn't stand a change, not even against a mid-villain. Even if they were in good shape, Shusei still doubted that they could win – he was fairly good with his spheres by now, but summoning his swords still was troublesome. And Hotsuma struggled with his weapon as well – although the boy could control his 'Voice of God' fairly well, already.

The brunette closed his eyes as he lay back down to the bed, ignoring the ache from his joints and the lingering background pain – gnawing pain on his burns and on the area nearby them. It wasn't as bad as it had been before, but it was still pain, and it still hurt. And the reminder that Takashiro had given him – about the battle, about the silence between him and Hotsuma – it didn't help any.

When Hotsuma slipped inside the room, Shusei turned his eyes to him, watching as the boy crossed the room, coming to sit on a chair next to the bed.

"Did it hurt?" Hotsuma's voice was filled with concern, his honest gaze genuinely worried as he spoke, hands coming to rest on the bed.

Of course it had hurt, but that was something Shusei could never say to Hotsuma's face. He didn't want to lie either – lies would only hurt their fragile partnership more, eventually the lies would shatter it to pieces.

It was something Shusei knew he couldn't take – and he wanted to believe Hotsuma wouldn't either.

But he couldn't tell the truth either – so he chose the half-way. "A little." As the brunette youth saw the expression on Hotsuma's face when the younger boy averted his gaze, he brushed his fingers over blondes, taking his attention back to himself. "I'll be fine."

Shusei wanted to believe in it. He wanted to believe that _they_ would be fine.

Hotsuma flashed Shusei a small smile, giving his hand a light squeeze before pulling back a bit, pulling the chair closer to the bed, never letting go of Shusei's hand. "You're tired, right?" Hotsuma asked. But before Shusei could answer, Hotsuma spoke again – he had made his conclusion already. "Just sleep. I'll be here."

Shusei didn't feel sleepy, not exactly, but closed his eyes anyway, letting out a breath.

They would be fine. Everything would turn out to be okay, because that was what they both wanted. They chose to believe in it, to believe in each other. So why would anything else matter?

Even if he was called 'God's eyes', Shusei couldn't see the future – so he couldn't see how wrong he – both of them – was.


	13. Chapter 13 - World won't just stay right

_______________Beta: Tegthe (Thanks again!)  
A/N: __This is one of my personal fav chapters this far. Because it's a grim reminder that all of us has darkness inside, and there is absolutely no exception. Again, thanks for your support, hope you enjoy! (Sorry, teruhi. I know you liked her.)_

* * *

_Chapter 13 – World won't just stay right_

* * *

_You know the world won't just stay right.  
So tell me, who's to blame?_

* * *

The doctor was on the same line as the nurse – if it was absolutely necessary, he would allow Shusei to leave after three more days. Takashiro had accepted it, not wanting to push the matter more – after all, a couple of more days weren't all that much. He thought it wouldn't make any difference, but he was wrong.

They almost made it – it was on the day when Shusei was supposed to be released when the elderly nurse came in to say her goodbyes to the boy.

"Thank you for your care", Shusei politely thanked her, pulling the jacket over his shoulders, careful not to make any unnecessary movements – the burns hadn't healed yet completely, after all. He took a couple of steps towards Hotsuma as he heard a soft click from the door, next to which the nurse was standing. Something wasn't right – why would she lock them in? That was when Shusei noticed something like a red bruise on her neck – an engraved blood seal.

She was possessed by a Duras.

"Hotsuma! She's –"

Shusei didn't get any further with his warning – the Duras beat him to it, shoving his partner straight to the wall with an incredible force.

Hotsuma let out a pained cry as his back met the unforgiving wall – there was no way for him to be prepared for the impact. Naturally, Shusei tried to move to his partner, but was stopped as the Duras extended the nurse's hand towards the Zweilt, a white glow emanating from her hand, from the magic spell she was about to cast.

"If you move, I'm going to finish your partner", she told Hotsuma, calm, sweet voice dripping with venom as her eyes flickered from Shusei to the other boy. "Of course, you could curse me with your voice, but it would kill the human as well." The smile that spread on her lips was cruel, heartless as she walked closer to Shusei, serpentine eyes still on the younger boy. Shusei didn't move, but his stance was tense, as ready for the battle as his unhealed body could be. "And you don't want to hurt yet another person, do you?"

She hit the mark – Hotsuma was still struggling with accepting his powers, accepting himself. His powers were offensive, made for destroying the Duras – if he turned them against humans, possessed or not, the human would die along with the Duras. "As for you…" She smiled, licking her lips as she gripped the brunette boy's chin, forcing him to look at her, hating the look on the boy's eyes – there wasn't scorching fear or defeat reflected in his eyes despite the powerlessness the kid must've felt. "…in your condition, what can you do?"

"Get your hands off my partner!"

The Duras actually had to hop backwards to avoid Hotsuma's attack – as she did, she pushed Shusei away from herself, to the nearest white wall. Shusei cried out as he crumbled to the floor – it felt that the impact was doubled, even tripled, due to his unhealed wounds.

As Shusei was on the floor, back against the wall, focusing on breathing and wishing the pain away, he lifted his head to look at Hotsuma, who was now standing between Shusei and the mid-villain ranked Duras.

In Hotsuma's hand, there was a unique weapon that existed only for him. The curvy weapon was kind of a mixture of a scythe and a hook – on it, there was a red line in the middle, moving along the curve, and the edges were white. There was also something written on the edge of the blade in black – it was an ancient language that no one could read anymore. The beautiful and deadly weapon was called Master Stroke – only Hotsuma could wield it.

Both Shusei and the mid-villain Duras were surprised that Hotsuma had been able to call his weapon forth – it had never happened before, not in this life. But when you thought about it carefully, it actually made sense – the Zweilt were always stronger when they were fighting for the sake of someone else.

It was part of the reason why the Zweilt worked as pairs.

Shusei bit his lip, counting their chances. The fact that Hotsuma could wield his weapon was favorable for them, but their enemy was still a mid-class Duras, which wasn't an easy prey. But if they could work together… Shusei tried to stand up, but a soft cry left his lips, pain forcing him slump back to the ground.

Hotsuma was still inexperienced in this lifetime, and keeping the Master Stroke beside him had to require a lot of strength. More than that, the problem of the Duras possessing a human body remained unsolved – should Hotsuma attack, he would still harm the human being whom the Duras was hiding within. Hotsuma couldn't exorcise the Duras from a human body like Shusei could, neither could he bind the demon.

Shusei could've – he remembered how, at least to a certain degree, but…

Together, they might've stood a chance against the Duras, but right now Shusei couldn't even stand, let alone fight.

The Duras had reached the same conclusion. A cruel, unnerving smile spread along her face again, twisting the kind human smile into something that was out of this world. "I never thought I'd get the chance to finish some Zweilts." She actually grinned, taking a step backwards as the white glow surrounded her hand again. "Goodbye."

Both Shusei and Hotsuma prepared themselves for the blow, but it never came.

Instead, a ferocious cry of the Duras reached their ears – demon's hand had been blown off by a golden explosion. With that hand, she was unable to fire, but something like that wasn't enough to finish her off, not by far.

"You shouldn't have appeared if you value your life."

All three turned their attention to Takashiro, who was standing at the doorstep – a quick glance to the lock told it had been melted. None of them had noticed anything. But then again, Takashiro was one of the most powerful – if not the most powerful – person in their clan. He wasn't their leader just for the show.

The Duras looked from her cut arm to the man who had just appeared as the realization slowly started kicking in – she was realizing who she was taking a stand against. "You…" She paused, backing towards the window. "You're the Giou leader!"

Takashiro didn't look dangerous when he walked among humans – he was just a normal man with long, light bronze hair tied up in a ponytail, square-shaped glasses, wearing a black suit with white shirt, red necktie and trench-coat. All in all, he looked like any other intelligent human being, not like one of the most powerful spell-casters in the history. He was a necromancer – someone who was able to summon magnificent, powerful beasts.

Most definitely, he didn't look like someone who could kill you in a second without having any regrets.

"Shusei", Takashiro spoke, keeping his eyes on the Duras before him, keeping the demon in place with a mere eye-contact, "make a barrier."

"He's injured! He –" Hotsuma started to protest, obviously worried about his partner's condition.

"Do it."

Takashiro's voice left no place for protests – he knew exactly how much strength it required from Shusei, especially since the boy wasn't fully healed, but they couldn't afford to have a Duras on the loose. Moreover, they couldn't let their fight affect the rest of the world more than it already had.

But even if Shusei would put up a barrier, it still wouldn't change the fact that Duras was hosting in a human body. "If I don't exorcise the Duras –"

"Shusei!"

Both of the boys flinched at the sound of Takashiro's voice. If he hadn't made it clear before this, he made crystal clear it now – he was their leader, and they were to follow his orders. If Takashiro valued keeping the fight from affecting the surface world over a human life, it was an order they had no choice but to follow.

Shusei forced himself to stand, and within seconds, Hotsuma was there to support him. Shusei leaned his back against the wall, Hotsuma's arm wrapped behind his back – the brunette didn't trust his shaky legs – and extended his hands in front of him, arms straight, left palm on top of the back of the right hand. Light violet glow emanated, becoming a circle below his hands. Then Shusei lifted his hand in front of his face, posture of the hands representing a butterfly. "Cut space." He kept that posture for a moment, focusing on the power emanating from his hands, surrounded by emanating light. "Lock set!" Shusei threw his right hand up towards the sky, not giving a thought of how much the movement stretched his wounds and hurt, and watched as the violet light shot upwards, through the roof, to the sky and from there, descending to the ground, creating a violet half-sphere as it descended. By the time the violet light touched the ground, barrier was complete, separating them from the normal world.

Shusei winced, letting his hand drop down as he touched his chest, the area where the pain was radiating from. It was a bad idea of course, making him pull his hand away as he was trying to will the pain away. The boy slid down to the floor again, grateful for Hotsuma's support – as least he didn't drop down to his knees like a rock.

Takashiro didn't pay any attention to the pair though – his sole focus was on the Duras who dared to cross him. He couldn't afford to lose any of the Zweilts now, especially since Yuki hadn't awoken yet – the Duras was going to pay dearly for thinking that she could kill some of the guardians behind his back.

The Giou clan leader stretched his hand forward, golden light appearing on his palm, forming a glowing ball of light there. "You should've never thought you'd stand a chance against the Giou clan."

The golden light left his hand, hitting the Duras. The hit caused an explosion, making the room suffer major damage, forcing the two Zweilt to cradle in order to protect themselves – Hotsuma doing his best to cover his partner.

When the smoke disappeared, there was nothing left of the Duras or the human host – just a black mark on the ground where the monster had stood just moments ago. Everything was gone, burned along with the explosion.

The Zweilt rarely got to see Takashiro using his powers – the man stood behind them, controlling the war from the shadows. The only moments when he took a stance in the battle field was whenever Reiga appeared.

Reiga. Traitor of their clan. The man responsible for the war, the one who controlled and summoned the high-class Duras to the battle to destroy the human world and Giou clan with it. Just like Takashiro, Reiga was extremely powerful – a necromancer as well.

"You can dispel the barrier now", Takashiro told Shusei, looking at the Zweilt pair.

Shusei nodded, briefly eyeing the man before he lifted his right hand towards the sky again, trying not to wince as he moved. "Off." The ring on his index finger glowed briefly as he called the barrier off, returning everything back to its normal state.

As the barrier disappeared, Shusei dropped his hand, getting rid of the pain it caused – the only pain that was left was the stinging feeling along with the background pain. He let out a deep breath, giving a soft, proud smile to his partner – Hotsuma had been able summon Master Stroke – before looking back to their leader.

"I apologize." Shusei wasn't sure if he really meant the words or not, but he understood that none of them should cross Takashiro – the man had far more power over them than most of the Zweilt even realized. It wasn't just the ability to control rebirth, but everything else as well – in a way, they were his chess pieces, his tools to win the war against the Duras – to settle the score with Reiga.

Takashiro nodded, showing that he understood and accepted the apology. "Can you walk?"

Shusei doubted that. He felt like putting up the barrier had drained the little strength he had. Shusei had never felt this weak – he couldn't even aid his partner in a fight against a Duras. If Takashiro hadn't come, it was highly likely that both of them would've died.

"I'll help you", Hotsuma told Shusei, carefully slipping his hand beneath Shusei's arms, careful not to cause any pain.

Shusei let himself be helped to stand and walk to the car Fuyutoki had brought for all three of them. As they left the hospital, Shusei couldn't help but feel sorry for the poor woman who had died because the Duras had possessed her.

It wasn't Shusei's fault, and he knew that, but a small, nagging voice inside his head reminded him that if he had been stronger, he could've exorcised the demon and she could've lived on. After all, the woman had had children, who would no doubt miss her. She had seemed content with her life, but apparently it hadn't been the case. It worked as a powerful reminder for the Zweilts that everyone had darkness in their hearts.

However, as a general rule, the Duras above the lowest class couldn't come to this world unless they were summoned. But if the woman had had a Grimoire, a book of magic containing methods for summoning Duras, she could've easily done that. The world was full of them, after all.

"She must've had a Grimoire", Shusei said out loud, mostly speaking to Takashiro.

"Yes", the man admitted from the front seat, looking at the young Zweilt through the back mirror of the car. "If we don't find it by hand, I'll have Tsukumo look for it." He paused. "You as well, if you're feeling better."

Shusei nodded. That much he could do, it wouldn't drain that much of his strength. Besides, he would need to work harder in order to get strong enough to fight against Duras alongside his partner – strong enough to protect his partner. Shusei didn't want to watch Hotsuma die – not again. "I will", he promised, head coming to rest on his partner's shoulder. Letting out a breath, Shusei closed his eyes, set on getting every ounce of sleep he could – he almost missed how Hotsuma's hand came to rest upon his.

Almost.


	14. Chapter 14 - Belong

_________________Beta: Tegthe (Thanks again!)  
A/N: __Sorry for being late! Apart from sleeping, I haven't been home in 5 days. :') I have to admit that I'm not fond of this chapter. Hope you do, though!_

* * *

_Chapter 14 - Belong_

* * *

_If I told you that you're not alone  
And I show you this is where you belong_

* * *

As Takashiro and the Zweilt stepped inside the huge mansion, they were immediately greeted by a happy-looking man. "Takashiro, sir!" The man wore a robe and a somewhat ridiculous–looking hat. Only after greeting their leader, he noticed the two boys. "Oh! Hotsuma and Shusei!"

It took only seconds for him to rush up to them and stop there. Warmly smiling he welcomed them. "Welcome to the mansion! With you here, it's finally getting livelier. Tsukumo and Toko have been here all by themselves, poor children."

"And you are…?" Hotsuma stated, more than a bit confused by this man who he had never seen before and who didn't even feel familiar. The mansion itself felt like home though, not only because he and Shusei had visited there years ago after Hotsuma learned about his powers – but also because in theirs previous lives, they had lived here.

"Ah! My apologies." Apologizing smile spread upon the young man's face, reaching his eyes. "My name is Tachibana. I'm the superintendent here. If you need anything, just tell me, alright?"

He turned sideways, so that the pair could see a shy girl standing a few steps away. She wore a traditional kimono, but her black hair was descending to her shoulders and back freely. "This is Kureha Aya. She'll be looking after you."

Aya smiled shyly, formally bowing a bit as she spoke, despite being about the same age as the two boys. "Nice to meet you."

Tachibana scratched his hair a bit, looking around, as if looking for something. "The Murasame siblings should be here already…"

"I'll leave you to it."

Everyone turned to look at Takashiro, who had already turned his back to all of them. Fuyutoki was standing next to the door, waiting for his master to come. "I have some business to attend to. I'll return to see how you're doing within a few days."

Before anyone of them were about to ask something from Takashiro, the man slipped through the pair doors as their attention was caught by a pair of siblings.

"Hotsuma! Shusei!"

Toko, another Zweilt, came running down the stairs, long bronze-red hair flowing as she hopped from stair to another, her silver-haired brother not far behind. She halted her run a few steps before the boys, unsure what to do – she wanted to hug the pair, but knew that they might not appreciate it, being hurt and all.

Tsukumo, being even more sensitive to people's emotions than his sister, knew this fully as well. So instead of hugging them, he took their hands, putting a huge amount of candy on them, making the youths stare at him incredulously.

"What?" slipped from Hotsuma's mouth as he stared at the other Zweilt.

"Welcome home", was all he said, soft smile on his face as he spoke. Both Tsukumo's eyes and voice were gentle and serene, carrying over a sense of calm.

Toko couldn't help but bring her hand to cover her mouth as she giggled at their expressions. "He really loves sweet things. Still." She cocked her head to her side, big smile rising on her face as she did, faint blush coloring her cheeks. "But like he said, welcome home."

"Ah!" Everyone's attention turned to the cook who had appeared in the room, shocked expression on his face as he pointed to the sweets. "Please don't eat those, at least not before dinner!"

"What –"

"But they're delicious…"

Both Hotsuma's and Tsukumo's begun sentences drowned in the horror of the cook of the Twilight Mansion. "They're unhealthy! You're growing young people! You have to watch what you eat!"

"Now now, we're all looking forward to the meal you've prepared for us…" Tachibana cut in, knowing what would be the outcome of this if things went wrong – it was better to calm the poor cook before suicidal tendencies came to light.

Toko smiled at Shusei, stepping to his side as they watched the four people continuing with the argumentation – Tsukumo trying to make a point that he could still eat the candy before dinner, since it wouldn't affect his eating, the cook trying to claim the opposite, Tachibana trying to cut the conversation in short, and Hotsuma was just caught in the middle. "He's the mansion cook", she explained, eyes on the quartet – as if it wasn't clear already. "Tooma Yatsuna."

Toko looked Shusei in the eye, taking a couple of steps towards the dining room. "Let's go already." She didn't quite dare to take Shusei's hand – not only because she feared the pain she might unintentionally cause, but also because she remembered how distant the boy had always stayed. Despite that, she still considered – had always considered – the boy as her friend. "I'm really happy that you're here", the girl told him as they stepped to the dining room. "I love Tsukumo, but it was getting lonely with just the two of in this huge mansion."

Shusei gave her a small, reassuring smile as he eyed Hotsuma – who was still busy with the conversation. "It's good to be home."

The Twilight Mansion was a place they had lived in their previous lives as well, which was why the place felt so familiar, which in turn resulted to a feeling of being home. To Shusei, however, place hardly mattered – as long as he could be beside Hotsuma, anywhere was fine.

It wasn't like the other Zweilts didn't matter – they were comrades, friends of a sort, and he would mourn their loss, but it was slowly dawning on him that Hotsuma was the only one whom he truly cared about. Hotsuma was also the only one who had ever been able to touch his heart, to melt the icy walls – even a bit – that seemed to surround it.

And that ice – it would only thicken in the future.


	15. Chapter 15 - Shade of empty

___________________Beta: Tegthe (Thanks again!)  
A/N: __ Ever since I first saw Uraboku and how Hotsuma acted when he saw Shusei's scars, I couldn't help but think how bad it was in the beginning. Things get easier with time, and that was how bad it still was for them, then how was the beginning? This chapter focuses around that, and well, it is angsty. But I enjoyed writing it - hope you like to read it, too.  
Next week's chapter might be a little late - I'm back in my home country and moving, and my beta is on a trip. Just to let you know, in case you'll be wondering. :)_

* * *

_Chapter 15 – Shade of empty_

* * *

_Something's wrong with you I see  
Your eyes have turned a shade of empty  
In my arms you pushed aside  
Wondered if you'd ever be alright again  
And try to fix what's goin' on inside of you_

* * *

It was after the dinner that the Zweilt returned to their rooms – no one had to show Hotsuma and Shusei to theirs, since they remembered.

The room was quite big – the boys had their own bedrooms, but they shared a parlor. The parlor had a huge window which view opened straight to the sky and beneath it, they could see the mansion's garden. In front of it, there laid a big, dark couch.

Both boys went to check on their bedrooms first – both were provided with a bed, table and a couple of wooden cabinets. They both had more than enough space.

Shusei had just managed to put the little stuff he had brought with him from home – his parents had briefly visited hospital to bring his belongings there as they said their goodbyes – to the cabinets as Hotsuma entered the room.

"Mah, your room is bigger than mine!" he complained, flopping himself to Shusei's bed, seemingly not caring the least about what the other boy might have thought about that.

Not that Shusei complained. He simply shook his head, wondering once again how Hotsuma could be so impulsive, and sat on the bedside, looking his partner. "Not really." Shusei did remember how the blonde's boy's room had looked in their previous life, and he doubted that any major changes would've been done to the architecture of the building. "Mine's just as not messy and packed with games and other things as yours."

"Hey, mine's not messy!" Hotsuma protested, making a face before stopping his thoughts, remembering how he had just basically thrown his bag in, and how all of its contents had nicely spread on the floor. Which was part of the reason he had come to Shusei's room. After receiving a knowing look from the older boy, the blonde shifted his focus to the ceiling. "It's not that bad. Really."

Before Shusei could tell his partner how wrong he was, there was a knock on the door. Shusei was starting to rise up from the bed, but Hotsuma beat him to it. "I'll get it", he said, glancing over his shoulder. "You should be resting, right?"

Shusei didn't have anything to say to that since it was true, but that didn't stop the youngster from dragging himself to his own room's doorway to see who wanted to meet them – he couldn't possibly think either of the Murasame siblings would, since the two were so sensitive of people's emotions, and caring individuals by heart. Tachibana had also wanted to ensure that they would get their time to settle in, not to mention get the rest they desperately needed.

"Pardon my disturbance", a man said at the door. He had black, shoulder length hair that was combed backwards. The man wore jeans and dark red shirt. On top of that, he had a long, white jacket – a clear indication of his employment in the mansion. "My name is Fujiwara Isuzu. I'm your doctor."

The man paused, looking over his glasses from Hotsuma to Shusei, who was still leaning to the doorway. "I understand that you must be tired, but it would be for the best for you to let me tend to your injuries." The doctor eyed Hotsuma's protective glare, but even if he was talking to both of them, his attention was mainly on Shusei. "You understand, don't you?"

"Yes", Shusei answered, cutting Hotsuma's protest before it left his mouth. The older boy crossed the room, stopping at the couches, leaning part of his weight against them – it was getting tiring just to be up, and even more tiring to put up the show.

"Good", Isuzu said, stepping inside, closing the door behind him. "We'll start with you, Hotsuma." The doctor laid his medical kit on the nearby table – Shusei was silently happy that the man had brought the necessary devices with him, since like this they wouldn't need to first go to his room and then back again.

With an un-amused groan, Hotsuma stripped off his shirt as Shusei slipped onto the couch, watching as the doctor checked through each burn. Almost all of Hotsuma's burns had been first degree burns, only a few of second degree, meaning that most of them had almost completely healed by now. A couple of them were still angrily red, but they had healed well and fast – the doctor voiced his suspicion that this was also because the flames were Hotsuma's power. Even though he could harm himself with them, even go as far as to kill himself, he would heal a bit faster than others.

"I think that's that", he finally told the younger boy, dark eyes focusing to the boy sitting on the couch. "Shusei?"

Shusei eyed his partner, silently willing the other boy away – he couldn't tell him so, fearing that it would only do more mental damage to Hotsuma – the blonde had already suffered enough – but Shusei didn't want him to see the burns either. Surely, they were better now than they had been over a week ago, but they still looked bad. And it still hurt to change the bandages, mostly due to the fact that the skin was still sensitive to touch.

The doctor didn't miss Shusei's uneasiness. "Hotsuma, maybe it would be better for you to leave?" he suggested, not looking away from the older boy.

"But…" Hotsuma protested, desperate golden eyes searching for his partner's, trying to get an eye-contact. "Shusei, please."

Shusei didn't want to, but who was he to deny his partner? Truth to be told, he feared that denying Hotsuma like this would damage their partnership even more. So what choice did he have? "It's fine", he told the doctor, not looking at either of the two, sounding far more sure than he actually felt.

Isuzu wasn't thrilled, seeing that what the boys weren't exactly honest with their feelings, but it wasn't his place to protest. "If you're sure", was all he said.

Shusei stood up, unzipping the hood he had – it was far easier to handle than a normal shirt. The Zweilt lowered the piece of clothing to the sofa, eyes never leaving Hotsuma – Shusei _needed _to see his reaction to the bandages.

The younger boy swallowed, obviously feeling guilty, but not turning his gaze away.

Shusei studied his partner as the doctor slowly, careful not to cause any more pain than necessary, took off the bandages. As the white bandages fell, they revealed multiple burn marks, red and angry, scattered along the pale skin.

When Shusei saw the look on Hotsuma's face, he knew he had just made the biggest mistake in his life.

The younger boy's hand came to cover his mouth. His eyes were wide, his face pale as a sheet, his entire posture rigid – guilt was written all over him.

Those burns… There was no way they weren't painful. He had brought that upon Shusei. Upon his best friend. His partner. To look at them, to understand the seriousness, the weight of his sin… It was more than Hotsuma could take.

"Sorry", he mumbled, rushing out to the corridor, to escape somewhere, anywhere. Somewhere where he wouldn't see those burns – wouldn't see the marks he had inflicted on his partner. It was a futile attempt – the sight was burned in his eyes, and it would never disappear.

"Hotsuma!" Isuzu called after him, ready to go and chase after the boy, but Shusei's soft voice stopped him.

"Let him be."

The doctor turned his gaze back to the youngster – still a child – before him. Takashiro hadn't given Isuzu the details, but he knew the basics – Hotsuma had tried to kill himself, Shusei had stopped him. Thus the burns. Go figure.

Isuzu understood that this was something the Zweilt pair had to deal with by themselves, but he couldn't help but feel sorry for them. Not after seeing the guilt-ridden look on Hotsuma's face and Shusei's posture right now.

The brunette boy was looking at the ground, hands squeezed into fists, short nails digging in the skin. The doctor couldn't see much of the youngster's eyes behind his bangs, but what he saw was a pained expression that had nothing to do with physical pain – it looked like someone had just ripped the boy's heart out of his chest.

"Just continue."

The doctor sighed, deciding to let the matter slide – he might need to mention about it to Takashiro, but there was no need to trouble a suffering child any further. In silence, he checked the burns – and was happy to see that they were healing quite nicely, given the severity, and concluded that there would be no need for new skin transplants. It meant faster recovery and shorter healing process, which would be good for both the physical and the mental health of the pair.

What worried Isuzu a bit was that Shusei didn't let out any cry or wince – he did try to twitch away from the touch, but that was a natural reaction from the body. The man knew he was being as gentle as he could, but there was no way it didn't hurt.

Yet Shusei kept it all in.

The doctor didn't say anything though, just looked worriedly at the kid. When he was done, Shusei backed a couple of steps, lumping to the couch, breath uneven.

The doctor collected his stuff, planning to leave in silence, since Shusei didn't seem willing to talk with him about anything – which was fine, he was just a doctor. If the kid wanted an advice, he would ask.

"Doctor?"

Silently posed question surprised the man – he hadn't expected Shusei to speak to him at all.

"Will these…" He touched his chest, implying to the burns there. "…will they scar?"

Isuzu let out a sigh as he rose up. He was a doctor – he wouldn't lie to a patient, and he couldn't give false hope either. Both of them would get people hurt – but that didn't mean the truth would be merciful, either.

"They will." Isuzu hated telling the kid that, but it was the truth – the surgery would always leave a scar, no matter how carefully it was treated. And the burns on Shusei's chest… They weren't exactly small, either.

"I see." Shusei's voice was carefully blank, void of all emotions – as if he had locked them away. As the youngster lifted his gaze from the floor, the doctor could see that there were no emotions written on his face or eyes either – Shusei was hiding himself behind an icy glass, putting up a barrier between himself and the rest of the world. "Thank you."

Isuzu nodded. "My pleasure." He turned away, but couldn't stop himself for giving the smallest piece of reassurance to the kid – he knew it was something Shusei probably knew himself, thus it wouldn't do much good, but he just couldn't walk away. "You'll find a way to get through this."

Shusei watched the doctor to leave, then turning his eyes to look at the darkening sky outside. He no longer believed everything would be fixed so easily – there was a gap between him and Hotsuma now, and he feared it would only grow with the time.

There was no way they would be 'fine' anymore – there was no way for them to go back to the easy, happy days they once had lived. Their bond would gradually weaken, and without that… What would be left?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Just emptiness – and loneliness.

_The scariest thing is to be all alone._


	16. Chapter 16 - Where's the conviction

_Beta: Tegthe  
A/N: Sorry for the long break - both me and my beta have been really busy recently. But here you go, more angst ahead, ahoy!__  
_

* * *

_Chapter __16 – Where's the conviction_

* * *

_Is there a place within for redemption  
__Is there a voice inside with a decision  
__And if so when, and if so then, where's the conviction_

* * *

Shusei didn't know how many hours it had been since the doctor left before the door opened again. The brunette boy had drifted between the dream world and the real world for quite some time now – his body demanded that he would sleep, but his mind couldn't find rest. Not with Hotsuma on the run somewhere, alone.

So he had stayed in their living room, cradled on the sofa, hands hugging his knees, head on top of them.

When the door opened with a click and a soft creak, his eyes shot up to his partner.

Hotsuma was dripping wet, clear indication that he had been outside, running in the pouring rain. Shusei wasn't really surprised at that – the other boy tended to get out of the house, to get under the wide open sky, when he was feeling bad.

That tendency had run short a long time ago though, since the blonde had started coming to Shusei every time things went wrong.

But he couldn't do that now, could he? Not when Shusei was the reason for his pain.

"Hotsuma…" Shusei started, but shut his mouth quickly – he had no idea what to say. He never had any words to give, even in the situation that needed them – not that he could ever pick the right words. No, Hotsuma was the one of them who knew what to say, whose words could either kill or heal. Shusei didn't have that kind of gift. He never had.

"Shusei." Hotsuma's tone was serious as he stepped closer to the other boy, closing the distance between them, step by step. He stopped on the side of the couch, looking down on his partner. "I'm sorry. I'll… I'll never let this happen again. Not to you, not to anyone. I…"

The blonde boy stayed silent for a while, hand reaching out to Shusei, but then he pulled it back – he didn't dare to touch Shusei, afraid he might hurt the other boy again.

His eyes were serious, gleaming with unspoken emotions as he locked their gazes. "I'll make it up to you. I'll spend the rest of my life atoning for it."

_No._

It was the first thought that came into Shusei's mind – he didn't want Hotsuma to atone for the burns, or the scars they would leave behind. It had been his own choice to step into the flaming inferno, to stop his friend from succeeding in committing suicide.

Shusei was about to protest, but the look in his partner's eyes stopped him – it was painfully clear how much Hotsuma was hurting. The blonde might've not suffered from the flames as much as his partner had, but it was dawning to Shusei that it was Hotsuma who had ended up being the most hurt.

Shusei pushed himself up from the sofa, reaching out for his partner. Hotsuma almost flinched as Shusei's long, pale finger brushed over his cheek. "It's alright", he said, voice barely above a whisper. Once upon a time, mere months ago, he would've wrapped his arms around the other boy in order to comfort him, but no longer – not when a mere touch was too much.

Deep inside, the brunette Zweilt knew he should've said something more, done something – he should've made it alright, somehow, but he didn't know the way. He had no idea what to say or what to do in order to heal the wounds in Hotsuma's heart – especially now that he had scarred that tender heart himself.

He might've saved Hotsuma from death, but he hadn't saved the boy's heart, not by far – what he had done had been selfish. It was out of selfishness that he had stopped Hotsuma – he had been too scared to be left alone for the rest of their lives.

Hotsuma had wanted to die, to be free – and instead of letting him to fulfill his wish, Shusei had pulled him back, forced him to stay in the place he desperately needed to escape from.

What he had given Hotsuma wasn't salvation.

What he had done – it was selfish, it was cruel, and it saved the body and soul but not the heart.

He should be the one apologizing, not Hotsuma. But… As Shusei looked at his partner's expression, filled with regret and pain, he couldn't say it. He would never be able to put his apology and feelings to words, not in the way Hotsuma would understand.

So it was better to keep this to himself. To lock these thoughts into a far-away place that no one would be able to reach – so that he would no longer hurt his partner. If he couldn't heal him, at least he could keep as much pain away from him as possible.

Shusei pulled back, letting his fingers trace Hotsuma's chin as long as they could. "Don't worry about it."

"But…" Hotsuma started, only to be cut off by his partner's gentle voice.

"Dry yourself so that you won't get sick", Shusei told him as he moved towards his own room, careful to not look at his partner's face. He couldn't - that suffering, it was caused by him, and him alone. "Good night."

Shusei slipped into his room, and as the door closed, he leaned his back against it, flipping the lock. As the soft click echoed in the silent room, he slid down to the floor – physically, the burns still hurt, but that was nothing compared to the feeling of your heart being sliced in two.

_Why?_ The word echoed in Shusei's lone mind as he squeezed his eyes shut, letting out a shaky breath, biting back a sob – he couldn't let Hotsuma know.

When had everything started to go so wrong?

When had he started giving pain instead of comfort to the one person he wanted to protect?

Shusei cradled his legs to his chest, much like he had done on the sofa. Why was this happening, why to them? Hadn't they already suffered enough?

All those times they'd watched each other die, seen the lively and loving eyes lose their light and become glazed. The people they'd held dear were nothing but ashes anymore – they'd watched so many of their comrades' die in arms of the Duras and unforgiving time. They'd even given up the hope to be together, to have a family together…

Their hearts had been broken time and time again, life after life.

Wasn't all that enough?

Apparently not.

It was their fate – and Shusei knew not even Takashiro could change it, let alone he.

The only thing he could do was to grit his teeth and bear with it, and take care of his partner as much as he could along the way.

It didn't mean it didn't hurt like hell, though.


	17. Chapter 17 - Can't erase it

_Beta: __Tegthe_  
A/N: Huge apologies for the long wait! First my beta was busy and when she sent this chapter to me, I was in USA and unsurprisingly, didn't have my laptop or any smart means to post from there! (Had awesome time though - got to meet a friend and cosplay and waah 3) But back to business. This chapter doesn't really move the plot forward, but I still like it - I have to admit, I love Tsukumo. (And when I was writing, they very nearly ended up shipping each other - it was me who had to pull on the brakes and stop it. I love them both, but do not ship them. Nope, Shusei belongs to Hotsuma.)  
Anyway, sorry for the long wait and long a/n, hope you still enjoy!

* * *

_Chapter 17 – Can't erase it_

* * *

_I can't erase it because it's with me every day  
The strangest feeling that never goes away_

* * *

The days blended into each other's – Shusei's wounds were healing, little by little, causing less pain every passing day.

With Hotsuma, they left the subject as it was – the blonde wasn't keen on picking it up again, and Shusei stayed silent about it for both of their sakes.

Quickly enough, Shusei started to hide the slowly healing burns – every time Hotsuma saw them, anguish flashed in his eyes and the regret and self-loathing surfaced, becoming visible. It was better to hide them from his vision – as things were, it was the only thing Shusei could do for his partner.

Hiding the scars didn't really affect their daily lives – normal clothes hid the marks easily, and since they had separate bedrooms, the changing was simple as well. The only thing it visibly affected was bathing. It was only after Hotsuma finished bathing, that Shusei entered the room – it wasn't hard for Tsukumo to notice that he was doing it on purpose. The white-haired boy said nothing about it, understanding how fragile the subject itself was – it didn't take genius to find that out, and besides, Tsukumo could read people better than anyone.

Usually, Tsukumo was also gone by the time Shusei came in – but on one day, that wasn't the case. When Shusei entered, Tsukumo was still in the room, switching his clothes back on.

"Welcome back." Ever so cheerfully, he greeted the older Zweilt – Shusei had been gone for most of the day. Takashiro had wished to see him, to discuss about his powers' development – it had been slow lately, due to the accident, so the Giou clan leader wished him to do his best and get his powers to the fullest – the war was getting closer. They would need everything they got, and Shusei's powers were one of the most useful to Takashiro himself as well – in the bureaucratic world humans lived in, it was important to keep an independent, useful political stance; Shusei's "Eyes of God" was one of the greatest tools for that.

"Thank you", Shusei answered politely, starting to undress.

As Shusei unbuttoned his shirt and discarded it, he noticed the younger boy looking at the almost healed wounds.

Upon noticing that he was discovered, Tsukumo spoke up. "Ah. Sorry for staring."

"It's fine", Shusei told him. He didn't think anything of the scars – it was Hotsuma who was pained by them.

"It's my first time seeing them." That was right – Tsukumo hadn't seen them before, even if Shusei had been able to bathe normally for a good while now. That was because Tsukumo always bathed with Hotsuma, thus never seeing Shusei without his clothes. "They've healed well, I suppose."

Shusei just nodded – he didn't know what to answer. It was true, he had recovered quicker than the doctors in the hospital had expected – whether that was due to Isuzu's care, him being a Zweilt or his will to get back on his feet as quickly as possible, Shusei didn't know.

Tsukumo's gentle voice pulled him back to the present, away from his thoughts. "Do you mind if I…"

Shusei shook his head, understanding the unsure gesture. Slowly, carefully, the white-haired boy closed the distance between them, pale fingers ghosting over the scars. They were still slightly redder than what they'd be in the future, but it was becoming clear how big scars would be left behind after the healing process would be finished.

Tsukumo's touch was feather-light as he traced the scarred skin on the left side on Shusei's chest, right above his heart. The skin couldn't sense the touch, much due to the fact that it was a skin transplant, but there was just the slightest tingling feeling on the sides.

"They will scar." Tsukumo's voice was clear and quiet – he was merely stating the fact. The boy's light gaze traced upon the markings before he lifted his head to look Shusei in the eye. "This is why you don't bathe with us, right?"

Tsukumo didn't need an answer, didn't even want to force Shusei to give one – lately, it had become harder and harder to read Shusei's heart. It was like the older boy was putting an ice barrier between himself and the rest of the world, so thick that even Tsukumo, who was 'Ear of God' and was able to read people's emotions and hearts, couldn't hear through it.

The white-haired boy was sensitive to other people's emotions, but he didn't have the ability to reach their hearts – just like he didn't have the ability to heal others. Only Yuki could do that, but at least he could hear and see the pain that existed. "Is it because Hotsuma still feels guilty?"

Shusei took Tsukumo's hand in his, gently pulling it down – Tsukumo wasn't Yuki, but he had always been there, a gentle and caring presence. He meant no harm – the boy wouldn't harm a fly – and he didn't look at Shusei with his eyes filled with pity. No, Tsukumo was genuinely worried about Shusei and Hotsuma – but then again, there was nothing he could do to make it alright.

Shusei knew it by now – Yuki was the only one who could heal Hotsuma's wounds. It might not have been possible in their previous lives, since the two had always been at odds with each other, and Yuki, as the clan's princess, had been out of reach for them. But now, Yuki had been reborn as a boy. This time, they might be able to reach out to him and he might be able to reach out to them – then, Yuki would be able to heal Hotsuma.

"Don't worry about it", Shusei said, voice low. He put up a small, false smile – a mask that he was slowly starting to master – and let go of Tsukumo's hand. It was better like this, not to worry the other boy, or anyone else either.

Shusei quickly discarded the rest of his clothing, and as he presented his back to the younger boy, he gave a small wave. Before Tsukumo could say anything – not that the boy would've, he was too considerate of other's feelings to say something that was out of place – Shusei entered the bathtub, closing the door behind him.

The brunette slipped into the bathtub, resting his back against the ceramic tiles, closing his eyes. Just staying like this was calming – at least for a second, the worries of the world could be forgotten.

As if it would be that easy.

Shusei opened his eyes, stretching out his hand in front of him, palm towards the sky. It took only a few seconds for a light blue sphere with a cross to appear there. It was emitting a cold, light blue light, glowing in the dimly lighted bathtub.

As Shusei called forth another, to his side, Takashiro's words echoed in his head. _I know you've had it rough lately, but it is necessary for you to get your powers __to __fully awaken as soon as possible. _Shusei knew that even without Takashiro reminding him – Hotsuma's powers had fully awakened on that day in the hospital, and there was no way Tsukumo and Toko would not be prepared and ready for the battles to come.

More spheres appeared. They started circling around the boy – faster and faster, faster than the eye could see, making it look like a blue circle of light was running around the boy – until the movement suddenly stopped before accelerating again.

It was no longer an issue to use the spheres and control them – as a matter of fact, it was quite easy already. At least he could count on those in the battle.

After a long while, Shusei left the bathtub – he was cleaned already, and it was getting late. There was still something he needed to do.

As Shusei started dressing up again, he noticed a small paper nearby. The brunette took the paper in his hand to see what was written on it.

_You're like a family to us.  
- Tsukumo_

That was so like Tsukumo. Shusei looked down on the table, noticing a handful of wrapped candy there. When he looked at the paper again, he noticed the words written beneath the name.

_Ps. Hope this helps you __to__ cheer up._

As Shusei looked from the candy to the paper, a tiny, genuine smile rose on his lips.

So like Tsukumo, indeed.


	18. Chapter 18 - Crossed the line

_Beta: ____Tegthe  
A/N: Aaand we're back on the schedule! Unfortunately this chapter isn't that long, neither does it bring "the plot" forward, but I still wanted to have this written down. Remember the scenes where Shusei was on police station, trying to figure out the Sleeping Beauty syndrome? Remember how the police men reacted behind his back? Humans are a cruel species, fearing what they don't know, and I'm somewhat highlighting it here. (Not much because it's Shusei, though.) But still.  
However, hope you enjoy, and don't forget to leave feedback, it really makes my day!  
(And in case somebody has forgotten, the lyrics and names of the chapters still come from Shinedown's songs - I don't own a crap. (And I don't even mind.))_

* * *

_Chapter 18 – Crossed the line_

* * *

_Seems I've crossed the line again  
For being nothing more than who I am_

* * *

When Takashiro brought Shusei for the first time to the police station, the faces of the carefully chosen policemen were unhappy – the men pretended not to stare at what the Giou clan leader brought with him – a child. And the important case files, the ones they had collected, would be given to the hands of said child. Needless to say, the men were far from thrilled.

It was also the first thing they were told when the policemen finally left them - the director of the branch, Takashiro and Shusei – alone in a small, plain room.

"Here are the files." The director, wearing a black suit and tie, hair combed backwards with a huge amount of gel, shoved them roughly to Takashiro. His eyes shifted to Shusei who was standing behind the Giou clan's leader. "I have to admit, when you mentioned bringing the expert in looking for lost things, I didn't expect you to bring a child."

The director's dislike towards Takashiro was obvious – he worked with Takashiro because it was the only way to get the 'unknown' cases solved. He didn't fully trust the Giou leader, but his eyes spoke of distrust towards Shusei.

"It doesn't matter as long as you get the results, does it?" Takashiro stated, not backing down a step. He didn't fancy working with these men either, but it was the easiest way to get information on the Duras' movements.

The two politically powerful men stared into each other's eyes for a while. Then the director grunted, looking away from the long-haired man, eyes shifting to Shusei and back to Takashiro before speaking. "Fine." The word was spat out like a curse – he wasn't allowed to show his dislike and distrust through words, but he was allowed to work his way around them.

With that, the director left the room, just to go and stand behind the glass window that showed everything to the outside, but nothing to the inside – he could see the Giou, but neither Takashiro nor Shusei could see him.

Without wasting more time, Shusei sat down, taking the papers Takashiro gave him, quickly reading through the main points. If it were another place and time, he would've read them through with care – but for now, the most important thing was to prove to the police that Takashiro knew what he was doing. That it was alright to give the files to a kid.

After a brief read, Shusei placed his crystal ball on the small, wooden table in front of him, hands coming above it.

"You can do it", Takashiro told him, moving a bit further away from the boy to give him space, but not leaving the room. The police had demanded that he would stay with Shusei as the youngster did his job – the police force didn't trust the Giou clan any more than what was necessary, and definitely didn't take it well at the fact that Takashiro brought another weirdo along with him.

Shusei let out a breath before setting his eyes upon the crystal ball, calling forth his powers. The transparent crystal ball became light blue – it was like thousands and thousands of small light seeds, much like stars, came alive within the ball. They moved in unexpected patterns, every now and then one dying, but another being born as the cold blue glow filled the room. It was beautiful, but that's all it was – it didn't make any sense.

Not to an outsider, that is – but to Shusei, in the midst of the blue light seeds, there were pictures. The pictures weren't clear images like photographs, they were more like memories, passing moments. But as combined, they would make a clear story – if he could see everything there was to it.

Shusei watched as long as there was something to see, but soon it became no more than regular light seeds with nothing to tell.

The brunette boy pulled backwards, letting his hands come to rest on his legs as the glow disappeared. Carefully he explained to Takashiro what there was to tell – it wasn't all that much, they had been given a limited amount of information after all, thanks to the distrust of the police, but it was clear that there was a Duras involved.

Takashiro nodded as an answer. "Good work", he told the boy before leaving the room to tell the results to the police and to get more files, leaving the boy alone in the room.

That was how the day passed by – first reading the files, then looking at the crystal ball. It was tiring, but in the end, they got results. They knew where to look for the Duras. It was everything they needed to know, and the police force could breathe at ease as well. Soon the unsolved case would turn into a solved one, and they wouldn't need to see the Giou clan for a while again.

While Shusei waited outside as Takashiro gave the full explanations to the director, one of the director's most trusted subordinates passed by Shusei. Or that was what he was supposed to do, but after passing the boy, he halted his steps, looking at the youth. He eyed the boy from head to toe, as if valuating Shusei's worth.

"You should know one thing, kid." He paused, looking at the young boy. "These cases are only given to you because we can't solve them." He paused again, icy gaze trying to find Shusei's. "You're not our colleagues. You're monsters that we're using to catch monsters. You better keep that in mind."

When Shusei showed no reaction or interest in the police's words, the man sneered, turned his back to the boy and walked away.

A monster?

That was when Takashiro came out of the room, brushing past Shusei and walking down the narrow corridor. "We're leaving."

Shusei didn't say anything, didn't even nod as an answer – he didn't need to, Takashiro knew he would follow anyway. The brunette boy wasn't too affected by the police man's words, but it was the first time he'd been called a monster. Hotsuma had been hearing that all his life.

It wasn't before now that he understood how deep one word could cut.


	19. Chapter 19 - Fight

___Beta: ____Tegthe  
A/N: And back to being late with chapters. Derp. And sorry. (Even though my beta is to blame on this one - but I'm still grateful for her sticking with me and my stupid mistakes. Stupid NaNoWriMo, I still feel like its time schedule ate most of my writing skills. (And in case you didn't remember, this story is my won NaNoWriMo 2012, and therefore I still complain. ;))  
Anyways, off with my rant, a new chapter is here, and with this time, finally some action! Hope you enjoy._

* * *

_Chapter 19 – Fight_

* * *

_Red nights, white knights, marching into the fight  
Drink me, shrink me, fill me to sink me_

* * *

Shusei hopped backwards, barely dodging a blow that was aimed at him. A sideways glance told him that Hotsuma had done the same.

A glance cost him though – he had to block the next blow with his paired swords, and the power of that blow sent him flying backwards. Nevertheless, Shusei managed to keep his balance.

The Zweilt pair was fighting against the Duras Shusei had found using his crystal ball – Tsukumo's ears had been a great, helpful asset as well. Takashiro had told the pair to go and find this Duras and defeat it – after all, the Duras was possessing a human body, causing ruckus around him, and that wasn't something they wanted.

The pair had found the Duras indeed – a bare mid villain – but what they hadn't expected was that the mid villain wasn't alone. The Duras had three friends – same level as it itself was. The mid villains weren't something to worry about, not when the Zweilt fought together as partners, one looking out for the other and filling each other's attacks – but four Duras, never mind the level, was starting to be a little too much.

"Burn!" Hotsuma yelled, calling forth the flames he had been so afraid of to use before. But the situation was getting more serious and worrisome as the seconds ticked by, and if they didn't do their best, they might as well lose. And losing here and now meant death for the both of them – it was something Hotsuma wasn't ready for.

However, the mid villains were good at working together – which was rare, the Duras usually preferred to work alone – and by working together, the four managed to dodge and nullify Hotsuma's powerful attack, even if only barely.

This meant they needed to use their weapons to finish these monsters off.

Hotsuma leaped to an attack as Shusei supported him – Hotsuma was the one with more offensive power, and Shusei's role as his partner was to fill in the gaps and protect his partner the best he could. The brunette boy hasn't been made for offense – he specialized in defense, which, at the moment, wasn't an option.

If he could just get time, a short opening, he could use his spheres to make a cage for the Duras – that way he could exorcise and bind the monster, force it out of the human's body. But no, the Duras weren't going to let him do that – they seemed to be fully aware of what the Zweilts were capable of.

Not that it really was a problem – according to Takashiro, Toko and Tsukumo should arrive as assistance in any second. The only reason Hotsuma and Shusei had to take the offensive already was to make sure that the Duras wouldn't escape again – this bunch had been pretty secretive, giving trouble to the police and Takashiro, even to Shusei and Tsukumo, for quite a while now.

"Hotsuma, don't take any unnecessary risks", Shusei told him as he dodged yet another blow, only to be forced to block another mid villain's attack with his swords.

The Duras had to hop back within seconds though, as Hotsuma's Master Stroke cut the air in the space where the demon had just been.

"I know!" Hotsuma growled. He wanted to finish these monsters as soon as possible – even if it meant taking risks. Shusei didn't agree on that though – with taking risks, they probably could have finished all four mid villains, but since the other Zweilt pair was on their way, there was no reason to take the unnecessary wounds. Even more so because Yuki wasn't yet with them, and there would be no one to heal those wounds – of course, the Giou physician could take care of the wounds after the Duras would be finished, but not before that. So it was better to play with care, to be sure.

Number of bullets ran through the air with incredible speed, taking one of the mid villain's by surprise. The bullets threw the Duras out of its human host, binding it to the air with holy powers. "Exorcise and bind!"

Before the Duras could do a thing, a huge sword slashed through it, killing the monster. Its body disappeared with a loud scream.

Toko landed on the ground, looking at the three remaining Duras' with despising gaze – these monsters had no right to take a human body as their own, manipulate and force the poor human to do unthinkable, cruel things.

Tsukumo stood a bit further away from the Zweilts and the Duras', metallic gun glistening in his hand – the boy used a gun as his weapon, and like Shusei, he was specialized in defense. Thus, he was able to exorcise and bind the Duras, forcing them out of the human bodies – in their partnership, Toko was the one with more power.

"Took you long enough!" Hotsuma growled at the pair – he didn't mean any harm, not really, but he was still annoyed by the situation.

The Duras' weren't too pleased of how things were turning out – especially the one who had just lost his fighting partner – they might've stood a chance against one Zweilt pair, but two… The tables were turned, and the odds weren't exactly in their favor.

One of the three took his chance, launching an attack towards Tsukumo. The silver haired boy had no option but to dodge – he wouldn't have been able to fire in time.

That created a path for the demon, an opportunity to escape – which the monster took willingly, disappearing into the night.

Tsukumo froze for a second, mind whirling. He wanted to chase after the Duras – an enemy _he _hadallowed to flee – but his heart didn't want to leave the other Zweilt pair.

"You take care of that one!" Hotsuma yelled, attacking the nearest Duras with his Master Stroke, making sure that not yet another enemy would be able to escape. "We'll handle these two!"

"But…" Toko started, more than a little worried about the two boys – she didn't want to leave them alone, to fight against two Duras'. Not that it should be a problem, but still…

"Don't worry, we can handle this", Shusei said, giving her a small, reassuring smile. "We can't let any Duras escape, can we?"

The brunette Zweilt was right – they all knew it. Takashiro wouldn't be pleased if they'd go back, telling that they let even one mid villain escape. Surely, the man wouldn't yell at them – it just wasn't his style – but there were more ways to break a person, to know that they had let him down.

The Zweilt knew Takashiro had a wicked way with words – even if most of them had never experienced it, not in this life at least – and that he could easily make you shrink, feel like the biggest failure in the world.

Besides, none of them wanted the Duras freely running in this world – the less demons there were, the better.

"Fine", Toko finally agreed, turning her back on the Zweilt pair, running after the Duras that was making an escape. If they were quick enough, they'd be able to trace the monster down. It was easier for the Murasame siblings than for the other Zweilt's – after all, both of them heard what the others did not.

Tsukumo didn't follow his sister immediately. Instead, he looked at Shusei. The 'Ear of God' was sharp – he could tell that not everything was okay between the pair, even if things had seemed to get better lately.

More than that, he worried about Shusei – Shusei hadn't been engaged in the battle with the Duras yet, meaning that none of the Zweilt had seen how well he was able to use his powers. Tsukumo did trust his friend – he was simply worried whether the two could actually make it without driving themselves to the brink of exhaustion.

It was easy to notice the Zweilt's worry, especially since he didn't make it any secret. Shusei let out a small chuckle, looking at the younger boy with reassuring eyes and a small fake smile. "Just go."

Tsukumo nodded, finally turning his back on the pair – he wasn't fond of leaving them, but if he didn't trust his companions, what in the world could he trust in? Nevertheless, Toko was already on the move, looking for the runaway Duras. She didn't possess exorcising powers, meaning she would have to fight the Duras without exorcising it, meaning that either she would let herself to be hurt or to kill the Duras and the human host along with it.

It was something Tsukumo couldn't allow – she was his beloved sister and partner as well.

As the silver haired boy left, Shusei let out a breath, focusing on the matter at hand. Hotsuma was effectively taking care of the two mid villains. He could only use his weapon against the demons though – flames would burn the human as well.

Shusei jumped to the midst of the battle as well – even he couldn't exorcise and bind two targets at the same time, not with the way he was now. Letting one escape wouldn't be acceptable, not by any means.

So they would just need to be quick and precise.

Shusei extended his hand forward, letting the paired swords disappear. He was counting on Hotsuma to keep both demons at bay – without his weapons Shusei wasn't much of a threat. Of course, he could still make a barrier to protect himself, but that would prevent the binding spell, since all his magic used the light blue spheres.

"Exorcise and bind."

Light blue spheres with a black cross in the middle appeared, shooting themselves to the ground beneath the mid villains Hotsuma was fighting against. In seconds, the Duras was forced to leave its host, the human body slumping to the ground. The Duras on the other hand was floating in the air, caught in the cage.

Naturally, the demon tried to get out of the cage, hitting the bars. But that was to no avail – this magic was holy, made especially for fighting Duras, to bind them in one place so that they could be finished.

Hotsuma hopped backwards, taking a stance close to Shusei, making sure that the other Duras wasn't going to attack his partner. "Say your prayers", he taunted the monster, cruel smile appearing on his handsome face. The blonde youth lifted his Master Stroke high in the air behind him, calling forth the highly destructive powers he had. "Burn in the flames of hell, you monster!"

The Duras' scream cut through the night air as the scorching flames hit it, burning it to ashes, making sure that the demon would never rise again.

Shusei let the cage disappear, turning his attention to the other Duras, who had smartly decided that defending his fighting partner wasn't worth it. Instead, the monster had found its feet, and was running away from the battle, as quick as possible.

Both Hotsuma and Shusei realized that the distance between them and their target was too big to be cut short by feet – there was just no way they could catch the monster by running after it.

"Shit!" Hotsuma cursed, running after the mid villain, not caring how pointless it may be – they had to at least try, right?

Shusei extended his hand, considering using another spell. From this distance, there was no way he could use the exorcism, the target was too far away, but he could use the only offensive spell he had – Cry Crow Diomedes.

But because it was an offensive spell, it would stop the target, alright, but it would also not only hurt the Duras, but also the human. There was a high possibility that the spell would kill the human.

It might not have been as powerful as Hotsuma's flames, but the black needles would shoot through the body. Unlike the flames from hell, they wouldn't kill immediately. The Duras would be stopped and harmed, but so would the human – the needles might kill the human, might not.

Did they want to take such a risk?

Shusei considered it. Finally, he lowered his hand. Their aim was to stop the Duras, all right, but they were doing that in order to save lives. Human lives.

They weren't doing this in order to take them.

Even if Shusei didn't possess much love towards the humankind – not towards anyone but Hotsuma in general – but it didn't mean he wanted to kill anyone. So he didn't shoot.

Instead he ran after his partner, only to find an exasperated Hotsuma in the nearest crossroad, cursing. "Shit!" he yelled, hands closing to fists as the weapon disappeared.

Shusei didn't say anything about the matter – it was clear what had happened. They had failed to fulfill their duty, letting the Duras – a bare mid villain – escape.

"Let's go home", Shusei simply told Hotsuma.

They started to walk towards the mansion in silence – despite the drizzle of rain, the younger boy wanted to walk. Shusei didn't have any objections – not that he ever did – and set on following his partner.

They had failed. It would mean more work for him, more work for everyone. More than anything, it would mean meeting an unhappy Takashiro.

It was something Shusei wasn't looking forward to.


End file.
